How do you deal with anxiety?

[artyboy]

Is driving a major source of your anxiety? For me it is mostly social anxiety and worrying about things (that I cannot control). In 2014 I was into some things like smoking cigarettes, pot and was also working a stressful job. I also like coffee.... Well to shorten the story I had a panic attack start up on the way back on a long drive, which got much worse when I got home. So bad that I at the time thought I was having a heart attack and ended up in the ER where they found absolutely nothing wrong with me. So that leads me to this...well first I'd like to hear more about your anxiety if you would like to share that but here's what I went through and how I (try) to deal with mine.

One for those who don't have anxiety problem I will point out that it isn't just a matter of feeling worried all the time. There's a long long list of things that anxiety can effect...basically the entire body.

So after my panic attack deal and thousands in medical bills (I didn't have insurance at the time) the doctors had me try several medications which led to nasty side effects that I didn't like. One of the medications made me vomit and diarrhea...pretty sure that was serotonin syndrome or whatever the case was...wasn't about to continue taking it, even after the nurse at the doctor's office claimed I had another panic attack (horse shit). So I tried Zoloft for a while, didn't have serious side effects but I basically became next to emotionless... I wasn't sad, but I wasn't happy...I didn't have anxiety, hooray right? Well it basically turned me into a zombie, I didn't like what it was doing to me as a person.

So I stopped medications, had enough of it and figured the only way that would work if anything at all was to see a therapist and at the time I only had a $5 copay because I didn't have insurance at the time. Results will vary just as they do with medications, but I found it to be helpful. I also found Dale Carnegie's books to be helpful as well.

Here's ultimate what seemed to work for me. It was actively thinking about how I thought about things and how they made me feel. In other words I would have to pay close attention to what I thought and how I thought about things that would make me worry about something or stress over things.

Now driving is kind of a catch 22 because you don't exactly want to have aroma therapy candles going and get too relaxed....




Forgive me for my stupid sense of humor...

Anyway, dealing with anxiety is different for everyone as the root causes are always different. I'm not dumping on medications entirely, they do have their purpose and some people inevitably need them but I feel for most of us we should look at them like stepping stones and should be on them but for limited amount of time.

Driving at night time is what I meant. I find it calmes me. Apart from pasting speed cameras lol. God I worry for days after passing one of those things.

I won't take meds if I can help it. In the UK the NHS doesn't like giving meds out. So they usually do cognitive therapy.

My purpose for this thread was to see what different methods do people use to help combat anxiety.

[InbetweenDreams]

I love your avi. Were you nude from the chest down? (Hurt me.)

No not in that picture. I don't like seeing myself nude, I don't think I look good nude...except maybe to some chasers or something...and well frankly I'm not fat enough for them either. I can't win...

[InbetweenDreams]

Driving at night time is what I meant. I find it calmes me. Apart from pasting speed cameras lol. God I worry for days after passing one of those things.

I won't take meds if I can help it. In the UK the NHS doesn't like giving meds out. So they usually do cognitive therapy.

My purpose for this thread was to see what different methods do people use to help combat anxiety.

I see, well I do like driving... Which is interesting because the worst attack ever came on while driving... That being said I hate other drivers.

We don't have speed cameras where I live (they do in some cities) but I also have a very good radar detector...

Well a lot of good advice has been given and the outdoors is very therapeutic. I like campfires. Something about staring at the fire...music and wine helps too lol

The best therapy is getting away from the thoughts that make you anxious. I see anxiety being something the mind does almost unaware of it, as it is not the "thing" that makes us anxious, it is "us" who makes us anxious. So you sort of have to study yourself and your own patterns and interrupt your thought process. At the same time you need to get away from thinking about those things in order to relax some and be able to have a clear mind to work on changing your thoughts process... If that makes any sense...

[NativeSon]

I don't like seeing myself nude

I'd fuck you.

[InbetweenDreams]

I'd fuck you.

I've heard that from many guys, most before the meet me...if they meet me. Anyway, that nice and all but that's not the only thing I want from a guy... I probably could have been pretty slutty but idk never really went there. I have had my share of experiences but ultimately I'd like to meet someone who I can call my best friend...then fuck them.

[NativeSon]

I've heard that from many guys

Anyone here? Let's name names. haha

[artyboy]

I've heard that from many guys, most before the meet me...if they meet me. Anyway, that nice and all but that's not the only thing I want from a guy... I probably could have been pretty slutty but idk never really went there. I have had my share of experiences but ultimately I'd like to meet someone who I can call my best friend...then fuck them.

It's around the other way for me, I look better naked, just getting a guy to that stage of the game lol.

[InbetweenDreams]

Anyone here? Let's name names. haha

Ok yeah you're the first one on GS.... But on so-called dating apps, quite a few....took up zero offers. Like say some rando guy messaging me saying hey let's fuck is the opposite way to get anywhere with me...no exceptions.

It's around the other way for me, I look better naked, just getting a guy to that stage of the game lol.

Well that's good that you're comfortable in your own skin. I think that is important.

[Emiliano]

I clean my apartment, organize my things, go for a run or work out, and bury myself in my work.

When that doesn't help, I panic, bury my feelings deep inside, lash out at those around me, isolate myself, hold my cat, drink wine, eat Chinese takeout, and binge watch Dawson's Creek.

I wish I was joking.

[Insertnamehere]

I have to echo the "not very well part".

Depends on what kind of anxiety we're talking about.

Normal, everyday anxiety, work-related, family drama, things like that, I just tank through it without even thinking about it. At best I have to concentrate on breathing while on the spot and then lash out in some form when I'm alone at home. Usually cleaning and working out work wonders.

In the few times I've had financial troubles, there was a hell of a lot of budgeting and insane planning. Planning things makes it all good for me, makes me feel in control of things.

Anxiety related with emotionally disruptive situations I'm living at any given moment and any kind of problem that I can't openly talk about with someone else tend to attack my sleeping patterns first.

My brain seems to relish in making me go through the situations in my head over and over at nights and I get really poor sleep accordingly (I bet a lot of people can relate to this bit).

Most of my ways of handling that is not dealing with the anxiety directly but forcing myself to sleep. That is done via alcohol, first generation antihistamins (I need those most of the time anyway) and working out furiously enough so that my body says "no more". All those, except for exercise are probably not very healthy , but I only keep them going for as long as I'm dealing with that particular kind of anxiety. Once I start getting better sleep, it tends to go away and I think less about it.

Finally, social-induced anxiety. This is by far the worse kind for me. At one point I've ended up on the corner of a supermarket aisle curled up and crying cause I just couldn't handle the amount of people flocking in every direction. Crowds kill me. But over the years I've grown to control that very well. I zig zag, walk fast, avoid people, I make a mini plan on the spot calculating what is the most direct route towards my destination while avoiding the most people, what is the nearest and least used exit out of a mall, what is the less transited street. Planning, again, makes me feel pretty damn good.

Other ways in which this anxiety shows up would be your typical social events and how much people tend to give you shit because you're supposed to go and you don't and this and that and how can you NOT?

I spent years in both guilt about my reticence to go to any such event and being uncomfortably forced to do them anyway.

Right now, I say "no" and don't give to thirds of a semi-floating fuck about what people think about that. I don't feel comfortable joining a group of people on a concert, club, bar, party, wedding, etc, so I won't do it unless it's really mandatory to do it or too ill-seen for me not to do it. (I wish I had just said no to my coercive mother about prom. I still regret going). Saying "no" and not giving a fuck, especially about what people will say, just cuts away any anxiety on the spot.

Instead, any random trip to the beach with some snacks, a gathering with a few peeps at home, prepping some food, that's all good. I can and will go out with anyone that makes me feel comfortable doing so. I can count that kind of people in one hand, but they exist and I do leave the safety of my room and face the ugly outside world with no problems with them. Be it going out to eat, just exploring around the city, seeing places you've never been to, etc. Doing all that even makes me forget how anxious I've been over other uncomfortable social events!