What would you do/say/act or feel...

[Darius]

I was going to ask if you felt he deceived you from the beginning, but then you shared more of your story and it sounds like he manipulated you from the get-go. He has used you for a live-in nanny and attacks your race and now your ability to be responsible when he is the real failure.
It's not like me to tell people online to break things off, but right now you are his doormat. You need to stop that because he won't. This is as good as it gets and it's pretty awful now. Right?

If you want children of your own with a man who wants the same thing, now is the time to act.

Good luck and keep us informed.

[Ammon]

Apparently his son was on time in school today, that brings me back to 0 times in 3 years!

I asked his son
Me: how many times did your father brought you late to school since I live here?
Childeren: a couple of times
Dad: excuse me!!!
Childeren: no not because of your fault, but because of the traffic.
Dad: yeah traffic.
Me: traffic or not I take the same road on the same time! And how many times were you late because of me?
Children: never
Me: his sister?
Childeren: once
Me: Your mother?
Childeren: many times..

I looked at him and said everyone brought the kids late to school and you guys are direct family, apparently I never did, but out of all people the only one who helps them with their homework, who always have to punish one or the other when bullying occurs, always take the blame for the kids so many times for the dumbest stuff. I always worry for their grades and always wanted to go to the pta-meeting since, not you or their mother wants to go!
But no this foreigner here, who is lazy and irresponsible and not worthy of a child, ruined your peaceful evening for the possibility that your precious child was almost late in school.

He started laughing realizing how big of a jerk he was. I simply left the kitchen

[LJay]

Ammon, you have posted this story, or a version of it, many times. Take your own hint. This person is not the one for you.

[Ammon]

I understand how frustrating repeats are, I'm also well aware that these situations obviously answers themselves.

But what you don't know is that there are 3 children two dogs 1 cat and 3 parrots of the 30 that we have that I'll have to break up with. What is officially mine is 1 dog, 1 cat and 9 parrots (5 of them I bought for him) and to break up with him means to break up with all of them, I just don't have the heart...

I'm hanging on a very thin thread called hope.

So I'm sorry if I annoy anyone one with these dumb dramas and I also know that you guys can't solve a thing for me, it's simply one of the few places I can vent and ask advice.

[deephiance]

the relationship is toxic...stop deflecting in an attempt to rationalise it and end it

[TigerLover]

He gave you the old switcheroo my friend.
He is not the guy you agreed to settle down with and you have no obligation to stay with him. I strongly suggest leaving him otherwise you're going to spend your old age miserable, unfulfilled and resenting your partner.

[Ammon]

He went to work last night and texted me "I apologies for my behavior earlier today about my son"
I still didn't open that window. I can't accept it. I'm going to try and search for a solution asap..

[bryyzy]

I never want kids and neither does my other half. I've had people say we are heartless etc. I just don't like kids. Too much stress and a drain on everything. Plus who wants to get up at ridiculous hours

[Ammon]

That's your choice and opinion, the thing is that if he said that in the beginning it would be a totally different situation.

[Marcus]

It's understandable that he doesn't want any more children since he already has 3, plus all the pets...I can't blame him for not wanting to get married either: you've only been together for 3 years, not to mention he did get married and it didn't go well. About that bad episode you just told: who doesn't get mad over silly reasons every once in a while? It would piss me off to no end, but I would never break up with someone based on this alone. Now, you stayed with him for 3 years and you wanted to marry him so you do love this man, right!? If so, "break up" is not the right answer. You need to seriously talk with him and get your own answer.