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What if your family finds out about your sexual orientation
#1
Guys how are you today ?

Have you ever experienced the act that your family finds out about your sexual orientation and they dishonoured you and they deny that you not part of the family anymore ?
How did you deal with it till now ?
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#2
I have not. I am blessed with a very supportive family.
I know there are many who have experienced and continue to experience what you are describing.
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#3
They won't react violently, they'll just tell me to disappear, I think. So I am not eager to tell them =/
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#4
Shouten, then wait until you are no longer dependent on them and tell them then, if you want to tell them.
If you feel they will abandon you one day, then become self sufficient and make a life for yourself. I know that doesn't lessen the pain, but you can't live your life for them forever.
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#5
You are right but what happened if you got caught having sex by your day and you are not considerate as a member of family anymore?
What will you do ?
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#6
Darius Wrote:Shouten, then wait until you are no longer dependent on them and tell them then, if you want to tell them.
If you feel they will abandon you one day, then become self sufficient and make a life for yourself. I know that doesn't lessen the pain, but you can't live your life for them forever.

Well, I am self-dependant, but only money wise. When we talk emotions, however, I don't think I can be emotionally independant.I can't sever the bond with my family. But this will happen. So idk what to do... . And I am, in the same time, 100% sure I want to tell them one day. Or rather, I don't want to lie to them.

This is such a drag. As for what would happen if they find out on their own? Well, I am financially free, so they'll just ... tell me to go away, never call them again and that's it ._.;
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#7
I asked my dad a few years ago what he'd say if one of his sons was gay or something like it.
He just said that's up to us, he won't stop loving us or kick us out of his house because of that.
My balls went away when he asked if I was gay, and I refused.
Well I'm probably not gay, but bi.
Or just curious.

If you're over 18 years old, you can get a job and should be able to find your own place.
So if your parents turn out to be shits, just go ahead and find your own place. Or some friends to live with until you can find your own place, or relatives that aren't shitty.
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#8
Josuepek Wrote:You are right but what happened if you got caught having sex by your day and you are not considerate as a member of family anymore?
What will you do ?

What most guys do, who end up forsaken by their birth family due to their sexual orientation, is build a new family out of friends and associates. It takes some time to achieve but it is not uncommon. Sometimes this involves moving to a more tolerant region where it is easier to be out.
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#9
Josuepek Wrote:You are right but what happened if you got caught having sex by your day and you are not considerate as a member of family anymore?
What will you do ?

I'd check with the individual members of the family that I care about, to see if they feel the same way. If they still love me, I'll keep in touch.
Otherwise, I'd leave them and make a new family.
I think I'd check back after a good while, to see if the situation changed. If it did not... sever all ties and forget about them.
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#10
I went through a lot of verbal and emotional abuse (dolled out by my father) while growing up due to my sexual preferences.

Where in some people, this may have beat them down, for me it ended up making me stronger. More independent. More stubborn. More determined to be my own man, so much so that I legally emancipated from my parents at 16.

Oddly (at least to me), I still loved my father. I also still allowed him to be a part of my life in order to stay in contact with my mother and sister. When he passed, I mourned him.

So I guess what I'm saying is everyone walks their own path. They can let what others say and think control their lives, or they can choose to walk their own path with head held high, and do things their own way. Why choose to be miserable when there's a better path out there? Hold those that matter close to you and let the others go.
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