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gay and mental illness
#1
This goes out to people who are both gay and have mental illness, as I have both.

How do you cope/deal with your mental illness on top of being gay?

Me, for the mental illness, I take medication and go to group therapy once a week (both of which help me very much). I'm still trying to accept the fact that I'm gay, even though I've known it for a few years now.
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#2
I suffer from OCD, Anxiety disorder and a compulsive disorder. Honestly I cope better with being gay, I wish I didn't have my mental illnesses but I have them and are a part of me. I have learnt not to let them control my live but they sometimes do. I wish you luck with your mental illnesses.
An eye for an eye
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#3
Being gay doesn't bother me at all, the mental illness on the other hand is something that always needs to be put up with. I have depression, medication helps me and I go see a therapist once a month these days. Depression for me ebbs and flows, it got to the point where I needed serious intervention last year. I still have moments of sadness, but it's training myself to understand this is my normal, that's my baseline. It's all a learning process of what I can and can't do, if I have a stretch of really good days and I have a bad day I just let my emotions go when I'm alone. In your case perhaps your illness onset happened before you realized you were gay? Might I ask what specifically you're dealing with? It's very hard, and I say reaching out is a great sign.
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#4
I have bipolar and anxiety disorder. The medication helps my moods, but I mainly have problems with managing my anxiety on a day to day basis.
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#5
a4b2c Wrote:I have bipolar and anxiety disorder. The medication helps my moods, but I mainly have problems with managing my anxiety on a day to day basis.

With my anxiety I do breathing exercises and that helps me. Maybe you should give it ago.
An eye for an eye
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#6
I have tried deep breathing, it does help. It's sometimes remembering to do it.
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#7
I never got a proper diagnosis but I am dealing with what I think is depression, inferiority complex, OCD and various phobias. Being gay doesn't bother me at all, there's a lot of other things about myself that I have issues with.
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#8
I have no need to 'cope' with being gay. I've been into men my entire life, and never had any issue accepting this part of myself (unlike my father). I choose to be a good person, and to accept me for who I am. This includes my preferences (sexual and otherwise). I don't live to impress others or live up to other's expectations, if they don't like me as I am? Too bad.

As for my mental illness. I have dysthymia with major depressive disorder and general anxiety.

I deal with this by....

1) Sharing this issue with those close to me that care about my well being. They help me by being supportive when I need it, and by making me aware of my mood shifts (because I am often unaware things are shifting until it is pointed out). They also remind me that I am needed when I am feeling... superfluous.

2) I go to therapy when needed (when depression or anxiety becomes a problem), as well as at least once every other month even if I don't feel I need it (to help me keep on track and make sure nothing is "creeping up" from a dark corner that I'm not consciously aware of).

3) I take medication. My anti-depressant does not necessarily help my anxiety or my dysthymia issues, but it DOES keep the MDD episodes to cropping up far less often, and with less severity, than when off medication. it also eliminates the suicidal tendencies that I've dealt with since I was a teenager.

4) I stay physically fit. Exercise releases endorphins which help lift mood. This assists me in staying balanced.

5) I meditate and do yoga regularly (sometimes simultaneously), usually at least once a day or every other day. This assists me in helping keep my anxiety under control.

6) I have a pet. She depends on me and needs me, which assists me in staying centered. She is also a comfort (physically and emotionally) when I need a touch-stone.

7) Focused breathing exercises. In the moment, breathing exercises can help me significantly lower my anxiety levels and center myself. As I prefer not to take medication for anxiety, this is important.

All of these help in their own way in keeping me emotionally balanced and functioning. It doesn't eliminate the issues, of course, but every little bit helps, and together they add up.
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#9
I just replied to this question under a different question: https://gayspeak.com/showpost.php?p=713383&postcount=6

IDK, if it helps.

Sure my other mental health issues affect relationships, jobs, etc... however these are not the only things that define me as a person. I am now medicated, therapied and all other things. I don't have just mental health issues, I also have physical health issues.

These medical problems do cause me to not go seeking another partnership/marriage/whatever its called. But then its more about practical matters... Do I want to be an anchor to a guy? My limitations are steadily growing, can a guy handle that? Should I let my healthy issues be a burden on someone?

IDK - currently my stance is "No more relationships". Period.

But then I'm tired, ancient, cranky and in the past 2.5 years I have come to enjoy the peace and quiet of being single.

I eat when I want to, I go places when I want to, I don't have to wait to use the bathroom for hours as some partner uses up the mirror time... I eat what I want, sleep diagonally or in the middle of the bed (When my dog allows it), I get dressed when I feel like it, brush my hair when I want to. No airs, no cares, no having to share...

I was in a relationship for 14.5 years this century, and I didn't allow my mental health crap to flood over the relationship. Hell I didn't even take meds and do regular therapy. I accepted my foibles and my partner accepted the screams in the middle of the night, the bouts of "crankiness" and lack of caring about things like combing the hair, blah.

That other post should make it clear that you are not just this or that, there is much more to you than these two things.
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#10
I'm not mentally ill and I'm indifferent about being gay. My friends and family are so accepting that it just feels completely natural.
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