I'm ashamed to be gay...

[jmfoster]

I came out when I was 14, and now being 17 all I've seen in the gay community is how shallow, slaggy and materialistic it is, the majority of gay guys are up themleves in one way or another, alot of them jump ont he bandwagon, and none of them seem to have any personality behind there looks and basic interests.

There's a few decent guys out there but not enough and most of them like to constantly bitch to. and about eachother too, I would ask what Is hould do but ther is nothing I can do, I guess my search for an interlectual, funny guy is over and now I'm gonan try getting with girls 'cus they seem to have more to themselves and you can actually trust them...

anyone else see my point?

[jmfoster]

also how alot of gays stereotype themselves puts a bad imrpession on the rest of us, finding a decent in-ddepth guy is like a needly in a haystack..

[soulfulldove]

i understand what you're saying mostly. especially about the stereotypes. i hate it when anyone just feeds into it because it gives anyone else that seems remotely similar just like them. i especially hate it when it comes to gay people >.> i can understand with certain things that mean a lot to them, like say they're a hair stylist or something and they get really picky and "bitchy" about what's right or something, but if they're like that ALL the time, it does get annoying cuz anyone who is ignorant enough is gonna see ALL gay people like that.

[marshlander]

I notice that you are 17 years old. With respect I would suggest that once you have a slightly broader perspective on the world you will hopefully realise that there is more to life than that which you are currently experiencing. Sadly, popularist media is only too happy to fill the gaps in people's personal lives with worthless stereotypes.

Another solution might be to move out of Nottingham ...

[cybermalemk]

Not all gay men are selfish, and untrustworthy. I understand what you are saying though.

I'm one of the rare, friendly and trustworthy type... but it took me a very long time to find a partner I could trust.

Whatever you decide to do... good luck, and I do hope that you find someone you can trust soon. Just have to look in the right places

[soulfulldove]

yeah, i wouldn't immediately go looking into the opposite sex so soon. as marsh said, you're 17 so wait a little while to broaden perspectives.

[spotysocks]

Hi there Gay ppl can be like how you say there is no escape from that you are right! It is not because they are gay nor everyone is like that. I believe it is a matter of maturity not always defined by how old you are but it is a factor. I know striaght people boys and girls who act like that. Close minded, selfish arrogant who bitch a lot. Not every human being is like that and is it's not about sexuality but about personality.
Whoever you decide to date a boy or a girl just hope they will share same kind of attitude. Dont worry too much and dont feel ashamed , because someone is like you in whater way (i.e. gay) doesnt mean they rappresent you . We are all are an individual, Now you know what you dont like you can seek what you do like.

[princealbertofb]

Maybe it's just a stage or phase you are going through where all the people you know or meet or associate with lack some depth of thought and feeling. Of course not all people are shallow and arrogant or full of themselves. I would suggest, if you want to meet people who are a bit 'human', something like joining in a charity group or an activist group. A group that caters for the poor or needy for example? You would probably find others willing to put their fellow men first, and that's probably how you will make good friends. Another way is often to join a club of some sort where you share the same activities, be it sport or something more intellectual like reading or brain puzzles ... or acting or singing, making music or pottery... Tap into the altruistic 'you' or into the artistic 'you' and you'll probably find life more bearable.
But first you need to decide what you'd find more exciting.

Now that you are reaching 17, the chances are you'll be leaving school and going on with college or university or a working life... Things ought to start changing for you.

[jmfoster]

I might just kill myself.

[princealbertofb]

One solution amongst many, albeit a rather drastic one... You wrote yourself: "There's a few decent guys out there but not enough ..." Why couldn't you be content with these few decent ones? Does the whole world need to be deep thinking? (yes, I'll admit a bit more altruism and thoughtfulness wouldn't run amiss, but...). Why don't you hang out with those people who are worth it?