Off The Cuff - Chuck's Poems

[CellarDweller]

Hello everyone.

This one is a bit of a personal one.   14 years ago I was involved with a guy who was a piano/keyboard player.  It was a long-distance relationship.  One night, he was playing some original pieces for me, as well as some other composed music, but he wasn't satisfied with the outcome of any of them.

Upon arriving home, I discovered a CD that he placed in my suitcase.  It was a recording his playing, some his, some the music of others.  The next day, I wrote this and sent it to him.




Your Music

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Sitting in the basement
hearing the clock tick
I place the cd in the computer
the one you hid in my bag
as a surprise

The music begins
it wafts out of my speakers
filling the basement with your music
and my head with memories

I see you, sitting there
at the keyboard
hitting different buttons and switches
in frustration
trying to make magic

and then, you play
and I can see your fingers
lightly touching the keys
and the notes fill the living room

ebony and ivory
bending under your will
and your talent
filling the room with sounds
where before there were none

I sit in the corner
and listen to the melodies
as instrumental music
religious and secular
floats through the living room

You turn off the keyboard
and get up and walk away
expressing dissatisfaction
at imperfect pieces

but I stay in the corner
and close my eyes
as the music still floats through my head
with the image of the man who put it there

[CellarDweller]

This poem was a 'challenge' from a friend. He was a gay man who had just come out, but was married and had a young daughter. He wrote to me and asked me to to write a poem about father and daughter.

I wrote this for him within 15 minutes, and emailed it to him. To my surprise, he called me shortly after receiving it, saying it made him cry, and that he planned to put it in a frame. I asked if it was OK to post it publicly on a website we were both members of. He said "yes".

It was in February of 2008. We were close friends, and he was killed in a freak accident at an outdoor event about 2 years later. I was devastated, and still miss him.



Daddy’s Little Girl

------------------------------------------

Good things come in small packages
I never believed that
Until the day you arrived
And I held you in my arms

How can I do this
Be all that she needs
And take care of her
For the rest of my days

I’m just a man
I’m supposed to feel strong
But this tiny bundle of life
Has turned me upside down

So much to teach you
To walk, talk and play
School work and home work
Boys, life, and love

Please remember I’m flawed
And though I’ll try my best
I will make mistakes
So please don’t lose faith in me

I’ll always be here
To hold you and love you
From your very first breath
To my very last breath

And though someday a man
Will be your new number one
Just keep this in mind
You’re always daddy’s little girl

[CellarDweller]

My Arms

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My arms outstretched
they can be strong
and with them I try
to do no wrong

My arms outstretched
they are quite hairy
I can use them to help
your burden, I'll carry

My arms outstretched
won't try in vain
when I place them around you
to comfort your pain

My arms outstretched
can accomplish much
so step up and reach out
they'll respond to your touch

My arms outstretched
can do much, come to me
but right now they feel useless
they're empty, you see

[CellarDweller]

Pulling Teeth

---------------------------------------------



anesthetized
feelings have been lost
and I sit and wait
nerves crackle like electricity
anxious beads of sweat
form on my brow
as I wait
the figure approaches me
and begins its procedure
then it starts
the first tug
a twist, a turn
feeling like I'm being jerked about
strange sensations and sounds
was that a crack
bits and pieces fall from me
will it be over soon
it feels like it's taking forever
slow motion movment
and then, it's done
there is a space now
where there once was something
the figure departs
and I'm alone in the room
my muse is gone for now
and the bits and pieces are on the screen
forming the words of my poems
sometimes this process
is just like pulling teeth

[CellarDweller]

Adrift

--------------------------------

Being adrift
Sounds so peaceful
But how can something so peaceful
Bring such stress
And uneasiness

What I was once so sure of
Has abandoned me
Leaving me adrift
Without direction
And no oars

A friend once told me
Those who wander are not lost
So why do I feel lost
On a sea of uncertainty
While others sail on

Adrift and alone
Once again
I should be used to this
So why do I feel
So confused and lost

One thing is certain
I won’t go on this way
So please excuse me
I must turn my attention
To finding the oars

[CellarDweller]

Brotherhood


------------------------------------------


take those in life, and hold them close
or one day you'll have regrets
my oh my how time flies by
make sure you don't forget
bonds that were formed between each other
may sometimes not feel strong
but brotherhood is always there 
even when no real blood makes you belong
on through life in forward motion
sharing thoughts and fears with me
you feel afraid, then turn and look
over your shoulder, and there I'll be
understand that life's not simple
real life can beat us down
extend your hands out to the others
they'll help turn you around
here's to friendship and brotherhood
each person raise a glass
because it's time to toast to us
every single lad and lass
so put your arms around me tight, hold me close to your heart
treasure each and every moment, so we'll never be apart

[CellarDweller]

Celestial Sparkle

---------------------------------------------

End of day, and I lay in my bed
Thinking the best that will happen
Is a night’s sleep
Suddenly, I’m surrounded by an aura
Pale green light envelopes me
And I levitate from the bed
And out of the window.
It must be a dream.

I find myself in a room
Surrounded by stainless steel
Or so it appears
With flashing lights, and an audible hum.
And it feels like the entire room is moving
Suddenly, sliding doors open
Revealing my hosts

They stand in front of me
And they make me think of polar opposites
Short in stature, but large in intellect
Skin an iridescent opal, eyes as dark as onyx
The eyes of God? No, but close….very close

They take my hand, and I feel a sense of peace
And they lead me to the main deck
Of their craft
I look out the window and see Earth far below.
I’m surrounded by a beautiful scene
Lights and colors beyond my comprehension
Celestial sparkle laid out
Against an inky backdrop of black
I look back down to Earth and realize
I have left the realm of man
And am now in the realm of God
Beauty beyond compare

One of my hosts approaches me
And touches my inner arm
There is a mild burning sensation
And everything goes black

I wake the next morning
And find myself back in my bed
A dream, it must have been
But what a fantastic dream
Then, I look at my arm and see it
A mark left behind from where my host touched me
A crescent moon
A reminder of my fantastic journey
And that I have experienced something special

Why I was chosen, I don’t know
But I will always be grateful, and never forget it.

[CellarDweller]

Size?


--------------------------------------------------------




So I sign onto the 'net, for something to do
I log into a chat, to see who is who
I create a profile, I put up my pic
I started to chat, I met people, really quick
In under 5 minutes, was messaged by 3 guys
and the first question they asked was, "what is your size?"
That was their first question, right after the "hi"
wanting to know what was, between the thighs
No "what's your name", or "how are you", nothing else to say
Just wanted to know, if I was up for a quick lay
I wanted to say, "can't you show some class?
do you know that, you made yourself look like an ass?"
Did you look at my pic, and think you'd push your luck
he looks like a guy, who'd give me a quick fuck
I really do hope, I don't come off like a prude
but I just have to say, I find your approach rude
"Hey, how's it goin'?, My name is Nick,
if you've got some spare time, would you suck my dick?"
No "do you want to meet?", "Do you like to dance?"
your only thought was, to get into my pants
well here's a news flash, I don't do casual sex
if you're looking for that, go call on an ex
If you want it go get it, go for yours boy
I hope you find someone, who will let themselves be your toy
I've got no problem with you, go do what you can
but I have higher standards, because I am a man.

[CellarDweller]

Here we sit in silence
no sound breaks through the night
and even with the candle lit
there isn't enough light

the heat, it is so stifling
the humidity is worse
here we sit in our discomfort
it's enough to make me curse

Here we sit in silence
not quite sure what to do
hoping for relief soon
so we can see this through

In the silence and the darkness
Nothing feels quite right
hoping that together
we will make it through the night


DAMN THE POWER OUTAGE!!!!!
DAMN THE POWER OUTAGE!!!!!


*written after the 2003 power outage that hit the East Coast during the summer on a humid/hot day*

[CellarDweller]

Candlelight



------------------------------------------



I strike the match, use candlelight
now I know, it will be tonight
I see you there, I'll take this chance
as I watch, our shadows dance.
I'll take the steps, the waters I'll test
I place my hands, upon your chest
I let my fingers move along
the radio plays song after song
I look to your eyes, there's excitement there
I can feel the energy in the air
you grab me hard, playing tough
my skin gets scratched by your facial "scruff"
I hear your heart beat from within
I love the feel of your skin on my skin
your breath comes fast, your kisses sweet
the room is hot from our body heat
Your arms around me, feel so strong
I know this is where I belong
there is no place I'd rather be
I let myself go, and give you me
On my body, your lips, your hand
tonight is going just as we planned
Your passion, your heat, makes me feel new
I'm glad I gave my all to you.