Okay

[cooperjames]

So I'm not really sure if this is the best place for my little self-deprecating rant, but I figured, what the hell.

So here's the deal. I'm out and didn't really have any issues. Came out last August to my sister and then my best friend, my mom and then bam, pretty much all my friends and the rest just followed. Here's the catch though, I miss the closet. A lot.

Not cause I like vag, trust me, I never even was good at pretending, but I kind of wish I wasn't out. I feel like now I can't really relate to anyone, even though they're all fine with it for the most part, but I'm kind of not. Is that odd? I'm not ashamed or bothered or anything like, I just kind of wish they wouldn't bring it up all the time. They talk about it around people i'm not comfortable around and when I say something they act like I'm being a dick or something. I'm like, it isn't your fucking business so if I say shut up, shut up. But of course I don't say that cause I don't wanna deal with it.

Am I being a total douche?

[Mark]

Do you mean people are too interested and too involved like?

Because personally when someone brings it up with me when they ask like.. So any guys you into? And questions like that I feel REALLY odd and really don't like discussing it all - simply as like.. It feels they are watching my answers more? :S Like if a girl asked another girl they joke.. but if a girl asks me its more SO I WANT TO KNOW... WHY LIKE THAT..

And I feel they are trying to answer their own questions through me which I really dislike.. But anyway I see what you mean and its understandable don't think you are odd because of it like. Its hard but if it gets too much I guess you just have to bring it up and ask in a nice way if it can not be the centre of any subject like? xx

[random91]

hey,

i get its alot.....when people talk about me to people i dont really know...but what annoy's me is they talk about you as if you werent there....

& about them asking me questions......i just answer them straight up & if they dnt like it.....tuff shit they asked a question so they should expect an answer.

[sox-and-the-city]

That's just other people trying to make you into a token. You can deal with this in one of three ways:

1) Ignore it, and conitnue your conversation in earnest. Hopefully they'll eventually realise you're more than just a sexuality.

2) Encourage it. Become the token they want and then look in wonder at the way noone ever takes you seriously about anything ever again. It's almost like you've been hopelessly typecast forever.

3) Meld the other two together. Be the token gay, but always ironically. Then bring them back to the previous discussion with a thud.

The best thing to do is have a sense of humour about it. Just like anything else.