Sex

[Adzz02]

Heya Guys!

The other day, my partner and I were having sex, and i couldnt make my mind up whether it was pleasurable or painful. Is this normal to think/feel and will it get better? (Just need to get used to it)?

Thanks x

[patric0909]

For me it's a painful pleasure if that makes any sense to you. I've only been bottom about 3 times in my life and I don't know if I liked it or not. The idea it self aroused me but the feelings didn't. As far as getting better for you, you'll just have to find out if you're a top or a bottom, or both.

[marshlander]

Several people have mentioned this over the time I've been on here, but seriously, don't do anything that makes you uncomfortable ... unless discomfort is what you seek!

Of course, part of being in a loving relationship is to be able give yourself to the one you love and trust, but that works both ways ... as it were! He shouldn't ask you to do anything that he knows will distress you.

I assume you are talking about anal sex here and not that he has suddenly discovered he is a dungeon master and is trying out his whips, chains and medieval machinery of torture on you? Part of the pleasure comes when you can focus on what you or he can do that makes you feel good. He also should be very careful and be prepared to take things as slowly as you need. Apart from the obvious stretching of the two sphincter muscles you have a bend in the plumbing a little way in which he may hit if he is well-endowed. That can cause discomfort. It does get better over time, but that depends to some extent on how willing you are to persist with it and want it to get better. Anticipation of pain can be a bit of a thriller killer :eek:

Usual rules apply - plenty of lube and go slowly.

[Robertson]

oh gosh, is it really that sore :|:|

[marshlander]

Don't panic! It doesn't have to be. And if you don't like it you don't have to do it. It's not as if you're trying to get pregnant to prove a point!

[Robertson]

hahah that was funny, i did chcukle at that and will it always be painful or would that kind of go away?

[marshlander]

"It's a lot like playing the violin
You cannot start off and be Yehudi Menuhin"

Ron Mael, 1974

[princealbertofb]

hahah that was funny, i did chcukle at that and will it always be painful or would that kind of go away?

If allegedly straight guys can do it (gay-for-pay), it can't be as bad as all that;.. It all depends on the preparation and how relaxed you can allow yourself to be, so in a way it's all about trust in your partner. It is also about finding the right positioning, as some positions are less comfortable than others, and some less pleasurable than others. Make sure you can actually breathe, as it wouldn't help to be suffocating. The plenty of lube rule does apply but too much of a good thing can sometimes kill the joy... work out what works best for you. As Marshlander said, you don't have to do it if it's uncomfortable, painful or just plain boring. Discuss it with your partner. The body is pretty adaptable, and a little private practice at home on your own may also help.

[Pickles]

oh gosh, is it really that sore :|:|

I was thinking the same thing :L

[Adzz02]

Thanks for the replies guys
I do understand what you mean patric! Theres times where its AMAZING and others when your a bit like ;l hmm...!
Robertson & Pickles, You wont know until you try ! Dont let this post put you off!
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