Yet another blonde joke.
Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building reparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Bob and said, 'Do you think he'll jump?'
Bob says, 'You know, I bet he will jump.'
The blonde replied, 'Well, I bet he won't.'
Bob placed a £20 note on the bar and said, 'You're on!'
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her £20 to Bob, saying, 'Fair's fair. Here's your money.'
Bob replied, 'I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news and so I knew he would jump.'
The blond replied, 'I did, too; but I didn't think he'd do it again.'
Bob took the money.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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A blonde is sitting at home one day when she decides she's sick of hearing all those blonde jokes, so she decides to dye her hair brown.
To see if it works, she goes to a farm. She walks up to the farmer and says, "if I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?" The farmer kinda chuckles to himself, and then replies, "Sure, why not?" The blonde pulls out a calculator and does a whole bunch of calculus and trig equations and comes up with a number.
She says to the farmer, "There are 314 sheep out there." The farmer looks at her with a shocked expression and says, "You're right! Go take your pick". The blonde takes a few minutes to pick a sheep, waves to the farmer, and leaves.
She's sitting at home the next day when she hears a knock on her front door. She opens it and finds the farmer standing there, holding his hat. He says to her, "If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"
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Yet another blonde joke for you.
A blonde enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assures her that they have a large selection of pink curtains. He shows her several patterns, but the blonde seems to have a hard time choosing.
Finally she selects a lovely pink floral print. The salesman then asks what size curtains she needs.
The blonde promptly replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small - what room are they for?"
The blonde tells him that they aren't for a room, but they are for her computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But miss, computers do not need curtains!"
The blonde says, "Hellllooooooooo! I've got Windoooooows!"
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And another blonde joke for you.
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she spoke about her problem with a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "as long as I can sell the car."
"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the Counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it shouldn't be a problem to sell it anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.
About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it."
Yes I do like blondes, but I also work with one. Some days at work I could die laughing, they do exist. 
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Rychard the Lionheart Wrote:A blonde is sitting at home one day when she decides she's sick of hearing all those blonde jokes, so she decides to dye her hair brown.
To see if it works, she goes to a farm. She walks up to the farmer and says, "if I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?" The farmer kinda chuckles to himself, and then replies, "Sure, why not?" The blonde pulls out a calculator and does a whole bunch of calculus and trig equations and comes up with a number.
She says to the farmer, "There are 314 sheep out there." The farmer looks at her with a shocked expression and says, "You're right! Go take your pick". The blonde takes a few minutes to pick a sheep, waves to the farmer, and leaves.
She's sitting at home the next day when she hears a knock on her front door. She opens it and finds the farmer standing there, holding his hat. He says to her, "If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"
This one is hilarious, Rychard... thanks for sharing. 
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[COLOR="Navy"]As a natural blonde I can assure you blonde moments do happen....here is one of my more famous from freshmen orientation at my college.
In the I.D. line....
Me: Hey, that line looks shorter. Maybe we should get into that line.
Friend: Burtt, that's a mirror.[/COLOR]
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I can testify that such moments are not the prerogative of blondes alone.
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Yes. another blonde joke. 
Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a
flower shop where the redhead happens to see her boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, 'Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again'.
The blonde looks quizzically at her and says, 'You don't like getting
flowers?'
The redhead says, 'I love getting flowers, but he always has expectations
after giving me flowers, and I just don't feel like spending the next three
days on my back with my legs in the air.'
The blonde says, 'Don't you have a vase?
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Yes, yet another blonde joke.
A blonde was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet, saying, "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."
When the blonde returned, she'd lost nearly 20 pounds.
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said. "Did you follow my instructions?"
The blonde nodded. "I'll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?"
"No, from skipping."
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Yes, another one.
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money decided to hire herself out as a "Handywoman" and started canvassing the neighbourhoods.
She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said. "How much will you charge me?"
The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately."
A short time later, the blonde handywoman came to the door to collect her money.
"You finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats - no extra charge."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her.
"And by the way," the blonde added ... "it's not a Porsche -- it's a Lexus."
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The Best Blonde Joke Of The Year
