Something Lacking in Life

[Para0402]

I'm not sure whether this counts as a confession... but... not really sure where to put it.

Well, was watching this movie recently though not a new release, "The Ugly Truth".
Then i suddenly began wondering, would i ever find someone that would ACTUALLY love me? Like a partner, u know.
I've read lots of books with romance and stuff in them.
But, i just thought bout this just... after watching the movie.

I've got some... issues with people. I mean, in life, i dun really trust people.
Speaking anounymously is more... comfortable to me.
I dunno...
I have been feeling so insecure for the past 18 years. I've not even had best friends that i could confide in.
I think it's something that i can change, but it's gonna be hard.

I feel... empty somehow...
But of course, i'm not having a depression at the current moment.

[marshlander]

Sorry to hear you are experiencing such feelings at the moment. I think it is likely you will eventually find someone to love you and whom you can love. I had to wait forty years to find my Prince Charming and he is worth every minute. I hope you don't have to wait as long.

Can you tell us something about the situation in your country? I have read that homosexuality is considered a crime in Malaysia punishable by up to twenty years in prison or by death in those regions that have adopted Sharia law. If you are living in this kind of environment it is hardly surprising you tend to err on the side of caution when meeting people.

[Para0402]

Yea. Malaysia is tough of homosexuals.
But of course, i'm lucky it's not death sentence like other Islamic countries.

However, i am not very sure of the Sharia law. I'm not a Muslim. I won't really know.
I'm Chinese. That law doesn't really apply to me.
But i dun dare test it out.

But since the Sharia law is there, people would tend to look at homosexuals in a negative manner.
Mostly people are quite cool with it i suppose. But majority of the population won't hate you for it, but would look down on you or something if you're homosexual.
They won't really be your friends.

So it's quite hard finding gay friends around since no one is up for confessing.

It's a hard life, but planning to move on to UK soon and see whether my chances of getting friends there are better. ^^

[peterinmalaga]

I had a Malaysian friend when I lived in England, so what you say about the situation there is not news to me. I think you have to follow my friend's example and move to a more tolerant country. Even if people don't hate you in Malaysia, it has to be a strain living in a society where the laws are stacked against you. Supposing you committed a crime (of any sort) it would not help your case if they found out you are gay. I am sure that your chances of finding a boyfriend are MUCH greater in any European country or in north America. Whatever you do, I think you have to be the one to make some changes in your life before things get better. Good luck and lots of love!

[Para0402]

Yea, i agree. Though moving to another country is easier said than done.
I'm going to UK for my last year in my course.
So it's strictly for study purpose. And my parents have drilled into me that no relationships are allowed til i start work.

So i have to see where things are going and hope for the best.
Thx for ur wish though. mile:

[Rychard the Lionheart]

while you are studying here in the UK take the opportunity to explore the options you may have. Staying in the UK for further education studies or work here, or in another European country. Sweden seem a cool place to live at the moment.

Does your parents mean full time work or part time work?

I can guess it is frustrating trying to find a partner or gay friends if noboby is going to own up to be gay, how do you tell if they are? Must be hell for you.:eek:

12 months in the UK you will certanly make new freindships and might enjoy living here.mile:

Good luck and stay safe.