Broken

[dreamer814]

So, I met this really great guy (or, I thought he was). We were getting along really well. He was bisexual, but I dealt with it. Suddenly, he stops talking to me. Not a single word. I tried to get a hold of him for 3 days and I got nothing from him. I feel like a stalker, now. I feel like a rube. It looks to me like he found a girl.
Not looking for advice about this. I know I need to give myself some time. Here is the problem.
There is this other guy who has been pursuing me for three years. He is really nice. He sends me birthday cards and gifts. He is pretty far. But, I don't feel that strong attraction to him. He feels it toward me. Since he lives far away, we have decided to have lunch in January. I think it would be nice to meet him.
If I start dating the guy who has it for me, am I settling for a sure thing? Am I rebounding? Can I grow to care for him romantically? I mean, I like the guy and, like I said, he's cute. But, should I date him and see where things go?
Why am I such a fool for the bad boys and not for the good ones?

[marshlander]

Sorry to hear about your really great bisexual.

New guy, hmmm, careful for both your sakes.. You know what it's like being rejected and what it's like being a stalker, but it's not much fun if the balance goes too far the other way and new guy starts to stalk you. It can be really awkward dealing with someone who fancies you more than you fancy him.

Good luck and have a nice lunch.

[peterinmalaga]

You win some, you lose some. I don't know whether I just function in an emotionally different way from other people but I really don't buy all this rebound stuff. If you like or love someone, I don't think that has anything to do with your past history. You say the other guy is “really nice” and “cute”. Now does that mean “He's OK, I suppose but.....” or does it mean “He's a good looking guy but.......” Could you see yourself having sex with him or is the thought of that unappealing? If you could enjoy a night of lust with him, I would say “Go for it!” but if not forget it. I do think that you could grow to love the guy, if you are having good sex with him. Sex is a very potent drug. And if this man really knows how to treat a boyfriend, that can become pretty addictive too. But you have to be honest with yourself and – equally important – honest with him. Don't string him along. Romantic love lasts for 2 years, no more (that's what the psychologists say). They may be 2 very good years but then you have to live with the guy and that is where so many relationships fall apart. If he's a good lay and good husband material, go for it! Good luck.

[fjp999]

[COLOR="Purple"]How long were you with mr. bi?

January is a bit off and youre just having lunch... now if it was a five star French restaurant!!!

Hope it all works itself out.[/COLOR]

[dreamer814]

My most sincere and abject apologies for not updating sooner. This is finals season and I am trying to finish up my work. Since I have a Latin final tomorrow and I have a portfolio review for my art class tomorrow, I should not even be here.
I am talking to Mr. Bi. The thing is, we do it when he feels like it. Actually, I talk to both of them when they feel like it. I am not really concerned with it, though, as I have mentioned, I have work to do and they are both distractions.
Like I said earlier, I have known Mr January through the Internet for three years. Waiting a month to have lunch with him is not bad. I have known since this past summer that he was coming to visit. We have had plans to meet for lunch since then. He plans to spend the entire afternoon with me. I think it will be nice. He has also promised to bring me out on a proper date.
I have been talking to Mr. Bi since November 4. He says a lot of things but I have not seen him act on one of them. As time goes by, I find myself scrutinizing these two relationships more and more analytically. I am talking to both men at the moment with equal promise. But, as time goes by, I am finding myself being more practical. While I am more attracted to Mr. Bi, Mr. January is more stable. I have decided to wait until I meet Mr. January and see what happens with him. Who know? I may meet him and find that we have instant chemistry. I may meet Mr. Bi and find myself ambivalent toward him.
One thing I find amusing, though: Since I told Mr. January that I am willing to finally give him his chance, he is beginning to cool down. I am beginning to believe that I am going to have to remind him that he hasn't won me yet and he is going to have to keep trying. The same thing applies to Mr. Bi.
But, since I have been analyzing this whole thing. I am beginning to believe that I may be leaning to Mr. January.
Mr. Bi, makes me hot. He makes me want to be naughty. He is really sexy and gorgeous. But, he is not reliable. I am too old to be concerning myself with having to chase a 30 year old down in order to have a semi-promise of nothing. Mr. January is very attractive, very handsome and he is being quite the gentleman. He has determined that we are friends first. The fire in his loins are secondary to him. It seems that Mr. January is more mature and more deserving of my time.
I have told Mr. January, "We always date the bad boy but we marry the boy next door." Although Mr. January lives extremely far away, he is still the "boy next door." (He thinks he's a bad boy, but he isn't. He is far too sweet and too much of a gentleman to be a bad boy.)
But, once again, I will wait until we meet in January to make that determination. I find myself excited to meet Mr. January. In many ways, I hope it works out. But, like the Old Man With the Horse said, "We shall see."

[Kiid]

Yay I hope all the best for you. Make sure you have fun with every thing!

=]

[peterinmalaga]

I like the sound of Mr J. He sounds level headed and reliable. Good luck. I hope there is physical attraction to make it all complete.