A little to much to drink

[ben]

Basically I meet a guy last night. I did make it perfectly clear be for hand that I was just looking for mates and that's it. I was driving so only had the one. But then really wonted another as I never meet anyone from on line be for and was very navours. This was at the guys home where we where just playing music and talking. He seemed real nice and offered the sofa for the night if I wonted another drink so I did have another and another lol and so on. Think you get the idea. I ended up getting a bit to drunk.

Anyway me and this guy ended up all cuddled up and I told him in conversation that I had done stuff be for with guys but not to much and that I had never kissed a guy be for.
Anyway we ended up kissing. It was nice and then we ended up later doing a lot moor stuff.

Am really kinder shocked with myself that Ive ended up doing this with a guy I never meet be for. This not me and am still shaking even though am back at home now.
Think I was just really really enjoying being all hugged up why watching a film together.
Ive not felt like that for a long time and that did feel good to have that with him.

I think he wants to see me again. He seems nice but am not sure if I wont a relationship with this guy. I have told him that my head is all over the place atm and Ive made no promises to him but even so I think I might end up hurting him.

So even though I have had a good time and even kissed a guy for the first time and God that was nice lol But am confused to shit about where I go from here and I think I do wont a BF. Just I don't think its with this guy even though he is very nice and less then 3 years in age part us.

I think its cos he doesn't really like to go anywhere. I am not the most out going guy that I know but I do like weekends away and days out not just stuck in a smoky flat. I don't smoke and he dose and I think also that kinder puts me off a bit as well. Still he may have had fag breath but he was still a nice kisser

And god am still shaking which is starting to do my head in now!

[marshlander]

Glad to hear you had a nice time. mile:

You'll have to see him again now ... but how about staying sober? It may help you make up your mind ...

[juk]

Ben,

Take a deep breath, and try to relax a bit!

First off, you have been open and honest with this guy about where you are at and where you see things going so you have no reason to feel bad.

So you shocked yourself at what you got up to having only just met this guy - well I would say dont give yourself a hard time about it.

You can set yourself boundaries in life and at the end of the day the only ones that should really matter are those that keep us safe and within the law - everything else should have some flexibility. You enjoyed this guys company, enjoyed a kiss and cuddle and you decided that you were ok to go further - its perfectly ok! It doesnt make you a bad person in any way.

You pushed your own boundaries on this occasion because it felt right to do so.

:-)

[ben]

If you was to had asked me whither or not I would had regretted doing something like this yesterday then I would had said I probably would. And I feel like I should regret it but I do not. He is a nice guy and did not push me to do anything. I just felt at ease around hm. Probably cos I got drunk but am still glad that I did get drunk cos I really did enjoy being with him.
The reason I don't really wont a relashionship with him is cos I do think I have moor in me then this guy dose. I know that sounds big headed but I just feel like I wont to be out doing interesting things not just getting hammed in a smoky room. He enjoys what he dose and that's fine. But he's lifestyle is not really the same as what I wont.

But ye next time I do plane on staying sober lol Still them Kissers where damn good haha. Am still gonna snog he's face of next time I see him

I think he knows as well from a text that Ive had of him that to be mates is where am at .
I think maybe I have confused that a lot though as I cant help but flaunt with him. Think he prob still knows that am not look to be he's BF tho. I think as long as I stay honest with him at the very lest I got a mate

And Ive had some sleep now and have eventually stopped shaking lol

[juk]

Well Ben thats very level headed of you! From what you have said you have been honest with him as to where you want to be so all I can say is enjoy snogging is face off!!!

[ben]

Am glad that come across as level headed. I think I normally am but yesterday I did not feel at all level headed lol

Now Ive calmed down a bit and court up on sleep I think am going to text him to see if he's in later. He only lives 20 mins up the road as well which is cool.

And ye am deffo gonna snog he's face of again Ive told him I am as well haha.
But ye am also going to make it clear that I wont him as a mate not BF.

But all this dose beat not having anyone in my life that don't know this side to me.
So am just real happy to be exploring all this.

And I meet this guy from some advice I got on here about joining other dating sites not just gaydar

[JtheYoungBear]

I think you should give him another shot - how about going out to dinner? And if there's alcohol involved, just keep things to a minimum - maybe one beer with dinner, some talking. Basically, a formal date. Maybe afterwards go to a movie, or go back to his place to just talk. It really sounds like (to me) that you may be growing some semblence of feelings for him, and the only way you can be sure to tell to what you really want is to give people chances in life, relationship or not.

This is also regarding your confusion as to what you really want - just take the chance, it may help clear your own head