My hubby used to bottom...now he won't

[Sil]

Okay so this may seem kinda odd, and I might get some kinda brutal replies here but here goes -

I've been with my bear for 5 years, and in that time we've never really got bored of each other. Anyway I was a cub and a bottom and fine with that, but over the last year or so asked if I could do it. Every time we got to it he just looked pained and wasn't enjoying it, and I'm a pretty plain six incher so not like I'm hung. I like to think I'm a good lover, take things slow for him and give him a lot of reassurance - I give him a lot of prep and rimming (which he loves) but once I get anywhere near penetrating him I get so guilted I just have to pull out. Sucks.

He's 30 I'm 28. Weird thing is he was bottom for his first long-term boyfriend Mark for a year. That's 9 years ago up to now without taking any dick (being blunt).

He musta liked it a long time ago but I accept he mighta changed. He is 100% healthy back there to be polite, so I'm not hurting him other than breaking him in again. I tried to talk to him about it and said "you must've liked it at one point" and he just kinda said "I dunno, just haven't done it for a long time" and looked kinda bashful.

I really want him to enjoy it but he just doesn't, it's frustrating; it doesn't cause friction because we still have good sex with him topping, I'd just love it if he got into it and wanted pounding. Any thoughts or ideas?

I just wanna post as an after thought that this really sounds like I'm forcing sex onto him, which I'm not meaning to. I'm happy for him to not like it and I want to be with him, so if that's the way it is I'm happy.


Yours sincerely, cub average

[SlipknotRlZZ]

Hi. :]

Well, I think you will just have to admit he doesn't like bottoming anymore. If he is willing to, try a couple more times, but if it doesn't work out just leave it. You are not forcing anything onto him - seems to me he does it for you. I wish you luck and happiness! :]

[marshlander]

If he has done it before I assume he has tried different positions? Sometimes it is a case of trying things until you discover what works best for you both. Maybe it's a little early in his "re-education" to consider "pounding" him?

Best wishes to you both.

[Sil]

If he has done it before I assume he has tried different positions? Sometimes it is a case of trying things until you discover what works best for you both. Maybe it's a little early in his "re-education" to consider "pounding" him?

Best wishes to you both.

Thanks marsh

yeah I think so... Just gotta keep being easy with him and take it slow.

lol I really shouldn't have said it like that >.< just said outta frustration. I'm more than happy if he says "nope".