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10-21-2010, 06:10 AM

So I dont know where to start... I can honestly say I have been straight the majority of my life, but no longer have any attraction to women whatsoever...be it sexually, emotionally, physically, etc; and this is what made me consider if I really am gay. In the majority of the blogs or forums I read, people who identify as homosexual say they have always had these feelings...at least from childhood or during adolescence. I turned 22 this month, and it was only until recently that I "realized" that I could possibly be gay. I really never had any homosexual tendencies or attractions during my youth. It just seems to me that I am lying to myself because I realized this so late. I have never been with another guy, and I am worried that I will just become more confused if I decide to be with one. On top of all this, I haven't had that much of a sex drive lately. I cant get off to anything..its literally been 2 months since I have. Idk I'm just rambling now...any imput would be appreciated

10-21-2010, 06:17 AM

first of all its never to late to realize that your gay or bi.
have you been feeling sexually attracted to guys?

imo just keep your options open and dont be afraid to try new things :]

fredv3b · 10-21-2010, 06:44 AM

Are you actually attracted to guys?

All you have said in your post is that you were attracted to women, and now you have lost that attraction along with your sex-drive. To be honest, unless you are actually attracted to men, I would say you are straight but for some unknown reason have lost your sex-drive.

10-21-2010, 12:32 PM

Hmm.
So you had sex with women when you were not attracted to them? Or where you attracted and now just are not?

You need to be a bit clearer on these points with yourself.

If you never had a second thought about being with a male, then chances are you are straight.

You had a sex drive, now you don't. This is the important thing here.

It can be one of two things: A psychological issue (emotional, stress related, part of depression, etc) or a physical disorder, such as a drop in hormones, illness, infection, etc.

In either case it should be seen by a doctor with in the next week or so since a sudden loss of libido (sex drive) can be indicative of some serious physical disorder.

There are psychological disorders such as 'sexual anorexia' where the patient totally loses any interest in sex. Causes and symptoms can vary greatly. While the onset is usually gradual and takes a few years, it has been known to happen almost as fast as flipping a light switch.

Let me clear something up with you, To be 'gay' is a lot more than just sex. To be gay means you have an attraction to the same gender - not just a sexual attraction, but also emotional and even intellectual attraction. There is within a need to bond, to find 'Mr or Miss Right' there is a need for love, commitment, etc.

If you feel a need to be with a man, if you think about cuddling, potential love, and things along that line, then most likely you are gay or bi with a strong gay leaning.

Having no desire for sex for women is not a singular sign of homosexuality latent or otherwise.

10-21-2010, 02:07 PM

I wouldn't sweat it as much dude, though that's easy for me to say I guess...

I came out properly around the same age after not wanting to admit it, and it is a little more awkward because for the most part you have an increasing amount of expectation waying up against you. But then you're stilll young Tongue

and you have a lot of time to get your head around these things. The one thing I always say to bi-curious guys is to experiment but be very careful, it's kinda like starting out all over again. If you do fool around it doesn't make you 'gay' and you have to live on a small gay island away from friends and family forever. Anything you do in your own time is your business.

Allow yourself to enjoy and indulge in your fantasies rather than feeling guilt for them. Negative associations are like stains, they're bitches to get rid of once they're there. So don't let them settle and do some soul-searching Smile

maybe even look around a little. The answers you're looking for are mostly your own.

10-22-2010, 12:14 AM

thanks for the imput, appreciate it

11-15-2010, 01:24 AM

i came out at 25 you are not alone welcome to Gs

11-15-2010, 01:48 AM

Dig further. Maybe there was something there before, only you've reppressed it so hard you don't even remember. Just now I was talking a friend and out of the blue remembered of a guy I had crush on on 4th grade! I wouldn't admit it to myself back then, but now that I think of it, it'a pretty clear.