Domination - As Victims

[marshlander]

I wish you hadn't mentioned chocolate in this context

[BillyJo]

Iome of the actions shown on the gallery looked pretty brutal, and it made me wonder - how do you draw the line between something being illegal and consentual? For example - if someone is making you suffer and physically harming you to a great extent by your own permission, is it still an illegal action?

If it is consensual then it is legal, but only to a point. If the dom gets a bit carried away and harms the other person then (in UK at least) it is illegal regardless of consent. Consent is no plea in an 'Offence against the person'. As to where the line is drawn, well that usually depends on who is watching

Hi everyone by the way Sorry my first post is a technical one: I saw something I knew the answer to!

[Ingz]

Well, considering the fact that I like a Vanilla BDSM from time to time, I know some things about it.
There should always be a safe-word. Stop doesn't mean to really stop. People often cry out something like "No!" and "Stop!" or something like that, but there always has to be a safe-word. I know of one pair that has the word "Pinapple". So if the sub uses the safe-word that means that it's crossed the limits and the Dom should stop what he's doing. If he doesn't stop, then from the minute the Sub says the safe-word it's non-consensual, and considered illegal. The safe-word is to protect both the Sub and the Dom. The Sub from harm, and the Dom from things like prosecution and so on.

[nick]

That stuff is just nasty.

[matty7]

i dont get it to be honest and do not want to be involved in it - what trauma could you have been through in your life that you'd want another person to beat you or humiliate you as a form of sexual gratification - i certainly dont want to look at pictures of it either, each to their own i guess

[fredv3b]

I agree, I prefer it when both my and my bf are, let's just say, active non-submissive participants.

[Mr. Not So Lonely]

Having been involved with the leather community for some twenty years i can tell you the EVERYONE has limits and they should be respected.
You must trust your partner and he must trust you.
if you like the really really ruff stuff go for it ,if you like a light slap and tickle go for it,if you like missionary go for it but don't close your mind to experimenting it can be fun to try something new.

[Darius]

I honestly don't know much about the legality, but as for motivation, I always believed it to be about internalized issues about power, control, and self-worth. Some people work out these issues, or at least work with or through these issues, through sexual activities that can border on the extreme. Some instead simply live in the experience of whatever self-percieved mental, emotional or personal deficit or shortcoming they have, sometimes exacerbating the issue, so I think the health of such activities varies depending on the person(s) involved.

[Ryan De Soto]

Heh... This is a topic I want to jump in to, seeing as sometimes we realize things about ourselves that shock us.

Domination/submission is often thought of in terms of torture like the acts referenced above, but most people don't realize that it can be much more subtle and EXTREMELY erotic. Yes, I enjoy the thought of "disciplining" a guy, but what's really fun is verbally dominating him, making it known that he is your toy, and making him LIKE it.

It's a kind of balancing act, of sorts, really, Domination and submission. Everyone involved has to clearly define their boundaries and be at peace with themselves, and there should be a safe word for reasons listed above.

Everything exists on a continuum, and D/s is no exception.

As for legality, where the line is drawn... I think that if the safe word is not respected, then the line has been crossed. If they don't say the safe word, it was consensual. As for any "bizarrity"... I'm still thinking heterosexual intercourse is unnatural and wrong. But I recognize my own biases lol

[The Virgin]

i love cbt (cock and ball torture) only if i'm the one kicking and holding the whip. but in all seriousness, it is alarming...