I am perplexed.

[Hasdrubal]

I'm a 18 year old college student from Michigan. I've watched porn for years now and took a look at a gay flick once or twice but they never really did much for me. Until yesterday that is. I spent a good couple hours in the middle of the night jerking off to gay porn ( I masturbate a lot to begin with). I know that that in itself doesn't mean much, but I have this urge to...explore it, I guess you could say. Now, though I'm attracted to girls, I've never gotten so much as a kiss from a non-family member, partially due to the fact I have some anxiety issues and never really put myself out there. How should I go about this?

[licious]

One step at a time.

The first step is to make friends who are gay or bi. Hang out with them in public places. Get confortable with that.

Then see where your interests take you. Maybe you are attracted to one physically and you might want to try something or have a relationship.

[princealbertofb]

If you are attracted to girls, would it be romantically or would you also say it's a physical attraction? You may be bisexual, in fact. What about gay porn gets your attention most? It could be some mental construction or fantasy that makes you watch and enjoy that particular gay porn you watched... It's not uncommon for men to compare their 'assets' to other men. Does it mean you are gay? Probably not. Not if you are not attracted by males in general, and in particular, wanting a relationship with one (or several).

[Hasdrubal]

Thank you very much for responding. I've always been physically as well as romantically attracted to women and this whole thing is rather disturbing for me. I've never actually seen a man out in public and felt attracted to him, but I never really saw men in that light until now. I'm not sure what exactly attracted me in the videos I saw, but I can't seem to stop. I've spent hours looking at pictures of penises and masturbating, which frankly isn't doing me any good.

[marshlander]

... I've spent hours looking at pictures of penises and masturbating, which frankly isn't doing me any good.

Best not overdo it then ...?

Our upbringings often stop us understanding ourselves. As has already been said, try not to panic and maybe widen your circle of friends to include some who are gay and comfortable with it.

Good luck.

[Hasdrubal]

Best not overdo it then ...?

Our upbringings often stop us understanding ourselves. As has already been said, try not to panic and maybe widen your circle of friends to include some who are gay and comfortable with it.

Good luck.

I may have been exaggerating just a bit. Thank you for the advice, I feel better now.

[princealbertofb]

You still haven't quite answered what made you watch the gay porn with so much interest... nor how it made you tick. But maybe it's time to give your wrist a rest... (like the alliteration by the way, )

[Roder51]

I agree with licious! Get some gay friends first!

[posterpicture]

My opinion: have sex with a guy ( no string attach and be safe ) to see how much you like it. That is the quickest and most accurate test.

[princealbertofb]

My opinion: have sex with a guy ( no string attach and be safe ) to see how much you like it. That is the quickest and most accurate test.

Although experience might teach him something about himself that he doesn't know, I'm not sure of the accuracy of the test. He might fall on the wrong partner who is not to his liking in the end, or with whom things don't go well and may thus not like it, while all along he might enjoy it tremendously with the right partner. As you know, PP, it's also a question of personal chemistry.