East Wrote:The number of gay teen suicides is what is really over the top. These words contribute to a general climate..a climate alot of people find impossible to even live in and that is tragic. I find the lack of sensitivity to other people offensive actually.
While it is absolutely true that people need to love and respect each other, it is nearly impossible to be weary of every single word that we sputter. I used to find those types of things offensive until I learned to be comfortable with myself. Honestly most who feel the way we do aren't searching for acceptance from another, but are actually seeking self acceptance. Its the hardest of all. Once that is achieved it's doubtful that hearing someone else call a video game gay is going to ruin their day. There are too many other things in life to actually enjoy.
On Edit:
Now that I'm not driving lol, perhaps I can finish this thought in regards to those who hate.
We need to be the ones to make a change. We also need to be the ones to set the example for others to follow. If we are completely comfortable with who we are and spend our time emanating a feeling of overwhelming happiness, others will follow. We can't spend our lives expecting everyone else to change their thought patterns and all of their behaviours to comply with our emotions. It's actually somewhat selfish to do so. My thoughts and beliefs may run different than the norm, but I genuinely believe that we have the ability to make a difference. Once everyone finds a level of comfort with themselves and starts to see people for who they are rather than placing focus on a label that has been assigned to them, things will improve.
Look at MLK, he didn't just fight for black people, he reached out to all people in hopes that we could see humanity as one. Great, great man.
/soapbox
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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every single word.....errr no just gay queer puff etc,self acceptance why is that? because gays are not fully accepted,its society that makes us feel accepted,not ourselves,stick a load of gay babies on an island away from society and I bet not one of them feels a need to accept themselves.
The kids in school today that have yet to come out and are hearing gay or queer etc in replace of words like bad ugly etc and the rest of it and even using it themselves to fit in, then have to admit they are gay,those people might find it doesn't help.
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simon Wrote:every single word.....errr no just gay queer puff etc,self acceptance why is that? because gays are not fully accepted,its society that makes us feel accepted,not ourselves,stick a load of gay babies on an island away from society and I bet not one of them feels a need to accept themselves.
The kids in school today that have yet to come out and are hearing gay or queer etc in replace of words like bad ugly etc and the rest of it and even using it themselves to fit in, then have to admit they are gay,those people might find it doesn't help.
Right, but in our current society it's absolutely essential that we accept ourselves and be stronger than the stereotypes and stronger than the hate. I'm not saying it's easy, my life is proof of that as I was the terrified kid who stayed hidden for years. The people that have been true to themselves a lot earlier than me are a hell of a lot stronger than I was.
Regardless, there's a lot we can do to make a difference.
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cry0s Wrote:Right, but in our current society it's absolutely essential that we accept ourselves and be stronger than the stereotypes and stronger than the hate. I'm not saying it's easy, my life is proof of that as I was the terrified kid who stayed hidden for years.
Regardless, there's a lot we can do to make a difference.
I totally get what you are saying but we don't live in a utopia,you seem to be saying if you get strong enough and get over the name calling and non fitting in,then you will no longer be bothered if you hear someone say your jeans look gay because you will have now accepted yourself,how about we try to get to a place where the word gay puff queer are not used at all,and that gay people feel accepted from the start and not have to settle for self acceptance.
sorry for going on but I really can't understand how a gay man that was married can think using such terms doesn't help with the crap gay people have to go though.
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cry0s Wrote:While it is absolutely true that people need to love and respect each other, it is nearly impossible to be weary of every single word that we sputter. I used to find those types of things offensive until I learned to be comfortable with myself. Honestly most who feel the way we do aren't searching for acceptance from another, but are actually seeking self acceptance. Its the hardest of all. Once that is achieved it's doubtful that hearing someone else call a video game gay is going to ruin their day. There are too many other things in life to actually enjoy.
On Edit:
Now that I'm not driving lol, perhaps I can finish this thought in regards to those who hate.
We need to be the ones to make a change. We also need to be the ones to set the example for others to follow. If we are completely comfortable with who we are and spend our time emanating a feeling of overwhelming happiness, others will follow. We can't spend our lives expecting everyone else to change their thought patterns and all of their behaviours to comply with our emotions. It's actually somewhat selfish to do so. My thoughts and beliefs may run different than the norm, but I genuinely believe that we have the ability to make a difference. Once everyone finds a level of comfort with themselves and starts to see people for who they are rather than placing focus on a label that has been assigned to them, things will improve.
Look at MLK, he didn't just fight for black people, he reached out to all people in hopes that we could see humanity as one. Great, great man.
/soapbox
I get what you are saying and I am extremely strong as a person and also extremely self aware...loving myself is a work in progress as I evolve constantly and being gay is and has always been a non issue for me...I feel special and blessed because I am gay so self acceptance on that level has been easy for me...I have other issues though so I can relate in general to your point...
...it is not "I" that I am concerned about in regards to these words though if you use them in my presense I will most likely ignore you...I feel a solidarity on a certain level for all of my GBLT brothers and sisters and not everyone is equipped to deal with the hatred...not everyone is strong enough...alot of my GLBT brothers and sisters have suffered horrific mental, emotional, spiritual and physical abuse...molestation...violence...and lack the self esteem and self worth to deal with these words and I feel it it my responsibility to try to make their path a bit easier as people before me made mine a bit easier...these words can have a devastating effect on some people...it is not just their problem...it is my problem as well because I genuinely care about other people's welfare...
This poem has always had a huge impact on me......
First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists and I did not speak out because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me.
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East Wrote:I get what you are saying and I am extremely strong as a person and also extremely self aware...loving myself is a work in progress as I evolve constantly and being gay is and has always been a non issue for me...I feel special and blessed because I am gay so self acceptance on that level has been easy for me...I have other issues though so I can relate in general to your point...
...it is not "I" that I am concerned about in regards to these words though if you use them in my presense I will most likely ignore you...I feel a solidarity on a certain level for all of my GBLT brothers and sisters and not everyone is equipped to deal with the hatred...not everyone is strong enough...alot of my GLBT brothers and sisters have suffered horrific mental, emotional, spiritual and physical abuse...molestation...violence...and lack the self esteem and self worth to deal with these words and I feel it it my responsibility to try to make their path a bit easier as people before me made mine a bit easier...these words can have a devastating effect on some people...it is not just their problem...it is my problem as well...
This poem has always had a huge impact on me......
First they came for the Jews and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists and I did not speak out because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me.
Then it appears that you are already taking steps to help out those who need it the most- that in itself is action . I can only hope you teach them to open themselves up more and learn to accept themselves for who they are. As I'm sure you know, sexuality is only a small piece of the puzzle and most certainly does not define one's existence. The second someone is completely happy with themselves, the negative actions of others don't really mean as much. Give those people strength, give those people love, and you will have given them the tools to be happy.
What I was hearing before was people wanting the world to change for them rather than taking the steps to change it themselves. There is a lot we can do.
Simon,
First, please don't apologize. If we lived in a utopia, I doubt that a conversation of this sort would even be necessary. I don't want to keep repeating the same thing over and over, but being happy with who you are can send a very powerful message.
I could go on and on as well, but I think I'm going to call it a night tonight. I know that my opinions may seem somewhat different, but I do stand firmly behind my beliefs.
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I think I have flogged this dead horse enough,if the horse wasn't so fooking queer it would have given in before it died but hey ho it was a shit gay horse anyway.
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simon Wrote:I think I have flogged this dead horse enough,if the horse wasn't so fooking queer it would have given in before it died but hey ho it was a shit gay horse anyway.
You should have picked up a llama instead 
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cry0s Wrote:You should have picked up a llama instead
 taken better than it was deserved,cheers
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is it ok?
