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Am I a slut?
#1
Okay, this is a bit weird. A little background first. When I was 19 I came out at 21 I went back in the closet and got married and had two kids. When my ex-wife asked for a divorce 4 years ago I said "Oh, thank God!" and came out again :-)

Now to the point. During my 16 years of marriage I became sort of... let's say "used to" straight sex. I am a very sexual person and can become aroused with just a thought or suggestion. This made it possible for me to function with a woman sexually. Well, that and LOTS of fantasizing! Anyway, now that I am divorced and single I have straight female friends like many gay men do and like many gay men, my female friends tend to flirt with me. Several have taken it to the extreme of trying to seduce me. I find it flattering and love the attention, but it really doesn't interest me at all.

Still, if they persist I begin to feel that rejecting them sexually is going to make them feel bad or insecure so sometimes, I say yes. Again, there is no attraction on my part. I don't want to sleep with them nor would I pursue sex with a woman otherwise. Emotionally for me it's kind of a non-issue. I mean I can go through the motions after 16 years of practice and it's really no big deal. Also they seem to feel great afterwards as if they have accomplished some great conquest which makes me happy.

So far it's only happened a few times (with different female friends) and with one exception none of them have seemed to have gotten too emotionally attached.
I sort of compare it to straight female porn stars who learn to have sex with women and then sort of become desensitized to it. I will resist for awhile because it's not something I really want to do but if push comes to shove I'll go there.

All this being said, my question is: Am I just a slut? Or are my fence jumping ego boosting (for them) romps just a way to make people I care about feel good? Is it even a bad thing? To have sex with someone whom I have no sexual attraction for?
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#2
Well....I am pretty sure that I am actually a slut:biggrin: so I can probably answer for you or at least give you my opinion...

Am I just a slut?

Do you feel like a slut?

Or are my fence jumping ego boosting (for them) romps just a way to make people I care about feel good?

From the little bit you have eloquently described...I think this is exactly what you are doing.

Is it even a bad thing?

Only you can answer that one but in my opinion...it is not a bad thing at all.

To have sex with someone whom I have no sexual attraction for?

There are worse things...much worse things...

BTW...WelcomeConfusedmile:
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#3
i can't answer you're question accurately but do you enjoy sexin' too many female friends? if yes, i guess you could call yourself a slut....
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#4
East Wrote:Well....I am pretty sure that I am actually a slut:biggrin: so I can probably answer for you or at least give you my opinion...

Am I just a slut?

Do you feel like a slut?

Or are my fence jumping ego boosting (for them) romps just a way to make people I care about feel good?

From the little bit you have eloquently described...I think this is exactly what you are doing.

Is it even a bad thing?

Only you can answer that one but in my opinion...it is not a bad thing at all.

To have sex with someone whom I have no sexual attraction for?

There are worse things...much worse things...

BTW...WelcomeConfusedmile:

So... If I don't feel guilty... I shouldn't feel guilty? Kewl! Thanks baby!
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#5
So... If I don't feel guilty... I shouldn't feel guilty? Kewl! Thanks baby!

I don't see anything at all for you to be guilty about...you sound like a cool guy to me. Really...you are quite decent in my opinion.
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#6
[COLOR="Magenta"]Well, one thing is for sure, you are definitely not a slut. I don't really know the what sleeping with women you have no sexual attration too implies as far as your mental health is concerned, but so far it doesn't sound like you're hurting or lying to anyone but these ladies by sleeping with them... at the same time since they're getting an ego boost from it so I guess whatever.

I wouldn't continue giving in to them though cuz eventually you may very well end up with one of them developing feelings for you, and then you are hurting someone. The lines of sex and emotions may not be blurring for you, but you can't really be in their heads to know what's going on. Sometimes saying "NO" to someone is the best thing you can do for them in the long run.[/COLOR]
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#7
Welcome to the Gs community of friends .

If you are a slut welcome if you are not a slut welcome we accept you nuff said
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#8
You are all so nice! I think I like it here.
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#9
i dont think your a slut you want to look for love thats all
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#10
My 2 cents

I think the girls are taking advantage of you. You now have the opportunity to get in touch with your gay side and they're holding you back and being selfish. Instead of using you for sex they should be helping you fulfill your potential as a gay man. You deserve to experience some gay relations and you should pursue that in short term.
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