How to tell someone you have a crush on them?

[xfrjk72]

So i have a really bad crush on this guy who may or may not be bisexual. I'm almost positive he is, but he's definitely somewhat in denial. Anyway, we've been become pretty good friends just in the last month, and on the weekends when we both get drunk he seems to become pretty receptive to little moves i've made (i've actually touched his crotch while dancing a few times and he hasn't objected.) Also, one time when we were both drunk and alone he told me that sometimes he thinks he likes guys. But when he's sober he acts completely straight.

So anyway, do you recommend telling him about my feelings? If so, how should i go about doing it? Should I be blunt about it? Should I tell him in person, or through a note/text? Most importantly, should I tell him when he's been drinking and might actually be receptive to it? I should mention that i'm not out and that i wouldn't want to ruin my friendship with him. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

[SlipknotRlZZ]

In person and definitely when he's sober, otherwise it might come out as you taking advantage of him. And...I don't know, maybe just talk to him about it and be straight-forward...but do mention that you really hope your friendship won't be destroyed over this if he doesn't like you back. I think that he will be understanding. If he's that kind of a person.. :] Good luck!

[xfrjk72]

I should also mention that he is just getting over a crush on one of my female friends (she rejected him). Would it hurt my chances to ask him now, or should I wait?

And normally i would definitely ask in person. The only thing is that people in denial are liable to freak out when forced into a situation like this, which i why i thought maybe a less direct method might be better, so he is not forced to react right away and can think about it, you know?

[Jfierce]

You may want to consider which is more important, friendship or a sexual encounter. If you really want to take it to the next level be prepared for him to get freaked out and not to want to be around you if you make a move or communicate your "desires." One approach could be to try to strengthen the friendship without sex and see if over time you can turn it into more.

You could also make a move when ur both drinking and if he freaks just blame it on the alcohol.

[xfrjk72]

Well i have sort of made a move. Like i said, I started rubbing his crotch once while we were dancing. He seemed to like and, and certainly didn't object, but he just sort of let it happen, he didn't take it further. Do you think i should tell him how i feel about him while we're drunk?

[Yosuke]

Well i have sort of made a move. Like i said, I started rubbing his crotch once while we were dancing. He seemed to like and, and certainly didn't object, but he just sort of let it happen, he didn't take it further. Do you think i should tell him how i feel about him while we're drunk?

Trust me, you do not want to do it while drunk. The times I began something while both of us were drunk never turned out well in the end. If you want a relationship to come of this current friendship, please don't do it while you're drunk lol. :biggrin:

[simon]

I think you need to slow down a bit,tell him you are gay if you want but I wouldn't be telling him how you feel at the same time,let him get his head around one thing at a time,you sound like you want to tell him and the next min get him in bed.