Hi and Welcome to the forum! :biggrin: Glad to have you! As far as your relationship goes your really going to have to come to a decision as to what is right and fair to yourself and to her as well. I wish you the best of luck!
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Welcome Ninja.
Regarding your situation, the last thing you want to do is figure it out by experimenting with men while you are still with her. Obviously you love her... but is it love & attraction? Or love as one could also have for a sister or best friend? If you can figure that out while remaining faithful, then you should know what to do. If you're still confused, then you should see if she is either open to the idea of an open relationship, or talk with her about taking a break. Either way she might not understand and you risk losing her, but this would still be better than any type of on the side experimenting, IMO.
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Hello, ninja, and welcome. It is a tough road you are facing and I applaud you for trying to sort out your feelings before it becomes even tougher.
While I normally agree wholeheartedly with jbrowder24 I think that experimenting with men is not "the last thing you want to do". From experience I would suggest that the last thing might be to follow one inevitable path into possible marriage, probable parenthood and almost definite depression. If you are gay it will eat away at you. Mother Nature has a way of getting your attention, even if it takes a while.
This is all very mixed up with mixed up notions of morality and what you will probably find yourself trying to work out is whether you can cope with the consequences of whatever decisions you take. One path is to sit down with your girlfriend and have an honest discussion with her about your feelings and concerns. You cannot be certain of her response, even if you think you know her, but you won't know until you have that talk. One pro is that you have laid your cards on the table and cleared the air (to mix metaphors). One possible con is that she dumps you before you are ready to let her go. You might agree to freeing each other up for a while to see other people - that is also risky, but carries fewer unwanted repercussions into the future.
You could take a walk on the other side and see how you respond with a man. It has the potential to get messy, but at least you'll have taken fantasy into reality and you may find out that it definitely isn't the way you want to go. However, even at nineteen, some of us are still people in the making and it sometimes takes a while to come to terms with aspects of ourselves such as sexuality.
Whatever you decide will be difficult. Nineteen is still quite young to make permanent decisions about your future. That is what I think I would have told my nineteen year old self ... but I don't know that I would have listened!
Best wishes and good luck.
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My tuppence worth....
Are you happy with her, emotionally, romantically, sexually, etc? If you are then don't torture yourself about your attraction to guys. If you are not happy then let her go (nicely) give yourself some time to be single and work out whether it's a guy or girl that would make you happy.
Fred
Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
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Sagittarius
mile:
) you could even be Bi or gay?
