Lost the one

[Bumpy]

Hey peeps, I recently lost the one guy I've wanted all my life, well technically speaking I didn't have him yet. But due to the decision I made at the time I lost the one guy I would've done everything for. We are still friends but his heart belongs to another.

It hurts so much that I do not wish to have any contact with him. Am I wrong, will I ever find another like the one I lost?

[Jfierce]

Take a step back. Who knows maybe you'll find someone better in the future.

[Bumpy]

I know I should and I'm trying hard to do it. I will have to start back at one.

[princealbertofb]

I'm sorry for you,, Bumpy. It makes you wonder what you did wrong, right?

It's a difficult thing to say, whether you'll get over it, and when, and whether you'll meet that special guy and when... The likelihood is that it'll happen when you have managed to get over this current thwarted crush.
Ok, the only consolation is that he never was yours to begin with, so obviously something wasn't meant to happen. You'll probably meet someone else, who is available and ready to meet your needs and requite your love.
Take that step back, indeed, and try to forgive yourself for investing too much of your emotions in that person. Tell yourself that you've got love to give and that you could give it to someone who needs it and deserves it, just like you. It'll probably happen when you next meet someone that you find attractive. Try to read the signs that they are attracted to you too, though.

As another thought, when you eventually feel ready to forgive this man, you may want to be friends with him and his partner because they might know just the friend for you... so it would be worth knowing someone who actually knows a bit about you. For the moment, it's all right to be feeling sore and bruised. Seeing him won't heal you, so avoid him for the time being.

[Bumpy]

Thanks prince, it's good advice I am trying to avoid him as much as possible. It pains me to be on my own like this and even though I think that I will never find someone like him again, I hope that special guy will come along. I've got lots of love to give and maybe somebody will appreciate it.

[princealbertofb]

I'm sure someone will appreciate it. Just, as I said, give yourself time to mourn this relationship that never really quite was.... But you know what I mean. Give yourself time to get over the shock of it never happening. Then turn to new things, focus on new goals and maybe when the time is right, start going out again. Meeting people who are just friends also often helps. Don't hesitate to tell people how you've felt about this (if you can, that is) because it also helps to alleviate the burden and stress of the situation.
Have a happy life, Bumpy.
A for you.
PA

[zeon]

Hello bumpy,
Dont dwell on whats happenned be happy for him... Of course your going to be still loving him as what he is but bide ya time and if that relationship goes sour give you and him another go then once his got over the current one... Be there to support him still and show him the loyalty.. Dont push him away or your cutting your nose to spite your face..

Kindest regards

zeon

[matty7]

although not much help right now,,,,,time is a great healer....would you rather have in your life as a friend or gone forever ??? give it time and you can still be each others life's, maybe not what you want right now but im sure would still love contact further down the line

[Bumpy]

Hey Matt7, that's true, I actually do not want him out of my life therefore I'm willing to work on a friendship, which is what he wishes aswell. It will take me awhile since the attractions was on all levels, sexual etc. He is exactly my type in every way and I'm the same for him, but he made up with with his boyfriend (who he was certain to leave) so quickly, it left me standing in the dust!!

[Bumpy]

Oh and thanks for the hug prince!mile: