I wanna commit suicide.
When no one loves and no one actually ever did... when everyone you ever loved didn't know how to get rid of you, a great friend and good person but an unlikely potential boyfriend because you're not muscled enough (and you can't train more because your doctor told you it's extremely dangerous for your heart)... when your good friends tell you that you're gay and you must kill yourself and your own dad says that normal people wouldn't even have dinner at the same table with faggots, is there any other solution?...
no, there is no.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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There is a solution.... and you will find people who love you, too. Maybe it seems a bit dark now ... but this problem have so many gay ... and some not gay people ( those who don´t live like their parents want )
Look out for a gay-helpline... by phone or personally, or come often here ... talk with us .. and you WILL find people who love and like you.
What your father talk to you is bad ... no question... but show him that HE has the wrong lifestyle not you. And... you don´t live your complete future with your father ... only maybe a time in your life... then you can do what you want, be who you want to be, find a bf to live with.
Give your life a chance to show you how beautyful it can be....
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind." - Dr. Seuss
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Where are you from and how old are you? Because what your dad says is evident of HIS bigotry, but not general opinion. Normal people not only would have dinner with homosexuals, but would gladly count them as friends and invite them and their lovers over! It's only the bigots that would not and sadly you seem to be in a situation where some of your family and perhaps others are bigoted, but you do not have to stay there (or even if you do for now, it won't be that much longer before you can go out on your own). And a lot of guys don't care about muscle.... have you tried looking on any sites for other gays near you? (And again if there aren't, perhaps you can change where you are soon).
Any person that would tell someone to kill themself - be it for being gay, or any other reason, is NOT a friend. Maybe they used to be friends; maybe you have memories with them. But if they don't understand that homosexuality is natural; if they instead choose to believe the lies and the hate; then you'd be better off making new friends, be it there or just laying low until you can have a fresh start elsewhere.
You are so much more valuable than what others have told you. Please stay strong, and know there are so many of us here that you can talk to.
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Your father is wrong, normal people have dinner with gays every day. Your "good friends" are clearly not friends if they think you should kill yourself. Homophobes and psychopaths are not normal. They need help.
Best of luck finding somewhere else to live. There is life after family.
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Please please, there is definitely another solution. I am a counselor in real life and before I became disabled I worked with severely mentally ill individuals who wanted to commit suicide at least once a week. I used to teach the suicide prevention course to new counselors, so I do know a great deal about the issue. Please message me privately so that we can talk in depth about your situation and hopefully I can help. Just a statistic...many people jump off of the Golden Gate Bridge to commit suicide. There have been survivors. Each of the survivors were interviewed some years back. EVERY single one of them said that after they jumped they realized that everything else in their life was fixable or at least able to be dealt with EXCEPT jumping, but that it was too late. Luckily for them, the survived the fall, but I feel quite sure that the others that didn't survive had similar thoughts on their way down. Just something to think about.
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mile: