Living with boyfriend, never came out, family don't know.

[Anonymous]

I'm 19 years old, and thought I was old enough to move away from home, which I did successfully. Well I moved away from home, which I absolutely love... but my situation is hard to deal with right now. I went to Virginia to live with a guy I met online, and then it failed, so I went back to my home state after two days. My family still thinks I am in Virginia, since I didn't go home, I went online and kind of initiated an online relationship into real life, so now I am living with my boyfriend. I don't think they will be supported of me, so I never even told them I was gay. They think I am straight, but at least I know I can survive without them if they reject me.

Now that I am living with my boyfriend in my home state I don't exactly know how to explain to my family first off I am gay... and secondly they want me to go back home and live with them. I don't think that's happening. I don't want them visiting me either, since I want to keep my boyfriend away from them as much as possible (he's significantly older than me).

So I am happy now, but I don't even know how to really fix my situation I suppose. I am also going to college in this city where he lives too.

[richardwrites]

first thing you need to do is be honest with your family. Believe me your parents are more concerned with your safety than your sexual orientation. Yes, they might be hurt that you didn't trust them in the beginning but I think they would be supportive. And the thing is with parents, we know things about our kids that our kids don't think we know. By that I mean that your mom already likely knows that you are into guys. She knew before even you knew. I know you are scared of being rejected by your parents and family. And I know its oh so scary to come out of the closet for that exact same reason. As humans we all naturally fear being rejected. But I promise you, it will all be okay. I know. I have a 20 year old son and I care more about him than anything else in the world and that is how your parents feel about you. I promise you, young man. It WILL be okay!f