I want to encourage those who fear to come out
07-18-2011, 09:33 PM
Hi!
I know lot's of you people are afraid of coming out - you fear that your parents will kill you, you think what people may think about you, you feel the community won't accept you etc etc. Listen to my story. I hope it will motivate you to come out or atleast you'll get less afraid.
So here is the thing - I live in Latvia, an extremely homophobic country where many people still live according to some USSR rules and dogmas. In some parts of my town it's dangerous even to look a bit different (I had long hair when I was young an got beaten for it a lot). Imagine how uncomfortable I felt about being bisexual: if anybody knows it - I'm dead. If I was gay it would be even worse for me..
The things changed when I went to military two years ago. I spent one year with lots of hot straight guys. I'm not going to tell you how, but some of them found out I was "not very straight" and started to pick on me.
This is where I took the best lesson every LGBT person should learn: you have to be strong. Not even physicaly (but it is an advantage for sure), but to have good moral. You have to be strong enough to openly declare to people that you are LGBT. That's what I did. I said to those guys: "I'm bi. Problems?".
It was difficult. Next week I was extremly cautious. I tryed to avoid being with guys as much as possible (which is difficult when you live in barracks). I was afraid of some sort of a sneak attack, cause there were some aggresive dudes in my regiment who could simply beat me up.
When I finally realized people were not going to touch me, I relaxed. I started chatting to guys again. They didn't say anything about my sexuality. Only few jokes and a couple of short dialogs on this topic - thats all.
It was a kinda forced coming out, but still.
To those of you who afraid - you shouldn't be. Just tell if you feel people need to know. Especially if you live in developed western countries where being LGBT is ok. Family members - they should understand you. If they don't - don't give up, be strong. If you always get arguments with your parrents just stay calm and explain. And friends - if they are real friends they understand you. If they don't - they are not your friends.
Community - if people see you are confident with your sexuality, if they see you are strong, they not going to say anything.
I hope my story helps atleast a little.
If you have a story to tell - post it here. If you have anything else to say to those who fear to come out: say it.
I know lot's of you people are afraid of coming out - you fear that your parents will kill you, you think what people may think about you, you feel the community won't accept you etc etc. Listen to my story. I hope it will motivate you to come out or atleast you'll get less afraid.
So here is the thing - I live in Latvia, an extremely homophobic country where many people still live according to some USSR rules and dogmas. In some parts of my town it's dangerous even to look a bit different (I had long hair when I was young an got beaten for it a lot). Imagine how uncomfortable I felt about being bisexual: if anybody knows it - I'm dead. If I was gay it would be even worse for me..
The things changed when I went to military two years ago. I spent one year with lots of hot straight guys. I'm not going to tell you how, but some of them found out I was "not very straight" and started to pick on me.
This is where I took the best lesson every LGBT person should learn: you have to be strong. Not even physicaly (but it is an advantage for sure), but to have good moral. You have to be strong enough to openly declare to people that you are LGBT. That's what I did. I said to those guys: "I'm bi. Problems?".
It was difficult. Next week I was extremly cautious. I tryed to avoid being with guys as much as possible (which is difficult when you live in barracks). I was afraid of some sort of a sneak attack, cause there were some aggresive dudes in my regiment who could simply beat me up.
When I finally realized people were not going to touch me, I relaxed. I started chatting to guys again. They didn't say anything about my sexuality. Only few jokes and a couple of short dialogs on this topic - thats all.
It was a kinda forced coming out, but still.
To those of you who afraid - you shouldn't be. Just tell if you feel people need to know. Especially if you live in developed western countries where being LGBT is ok. Family members - they should understand you. If they don't - don't give up, be strong. If you always get arguments with your parrents just stay calm and explain. And friends - if they are real friends they understand you. If they don't - they are not your friends.
Community - if people see you are confident with your sexuality, if they see you are strong, they not going to say anything.
I hope my story helps atleast a little.
If you have a story to tell - post it here. If you have anything else to say to those who fear to come out: say it.
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