only you would know to be honest
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yes i suppose. i imagine if i enjoyed sucking cock there must have been a bi part in action...
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yes, except i would only repeat this with the same straight friend from that time, otherwise i would be out of my comfort zone. so sadly it probably won't happen and this won't have the closure i wanted (i.e. seeing what a hot fat load down my throat feels like, though i've tried my own but it's not the same)
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You might be disappointed... I think it's more in your head than you expect, more of a mental process than a real pleasure game. On the other hand, I'll agree that it's hot to make another man come.
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of course, but sex is all mental anyway, no? i just wanna try it once because i didn't do it that time, and now i have talked about it at lenght so the whole idea gets me horny. having said that, i probably never will cause i won't be able to do it with the same person... we'll see what happens
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If it becomes that much of an obsession, I think you might seek out another man who'd be ready to let you swallow him.... Is it just with this man because he knows you can suck cock, and you don't want anyone else to know? Or is there some notion of power play here, because, although you were ready to let him come in your mouth, he denied you the pleasure, and you want to get even? I wonder why you are so attached to the fact that it should be the same man? I find it strange that your comfort zone (since you maintain that you are straight) doesn't extend to any man. You could obviously perform with one, since you've done it before, and I'm not sure that you were any more attracted to him than you would be to another male, in fact. You must admit the circumstances are what made you act out of curiosity. I don't think the fact of doing it with another man will change your state of mind. If you think and say you are straight, then you are straight. (I think I'd accept 'bisexual', or at least 'able to operate with another man', even though I don't find labelling useful here). I'm trying to understand how you can assuage your curiosity and still maintain a sense of dignity for yourself. If you saw nothing wrong in the act, now that you've sobered up, then you should just see it as a natural part of your sexuality and libido, shouldn't you?
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I'm also thinking that maybe putting that barrier (that it HAS to be with the same man, or else no go) up for yourself is your way of keeping your libido in check, so that it doesn't make you stray from the path you've set yourself as a straight man. Life, though, isn't always quite so clear cut.
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princealbertofb Wrote:I'm also thinking that maybe putting that barrier (that it HAS to be with the same man, or else no go) up for yourself is your way of keeping your libido in check, so that it doesn't make you stray from the path you've set yourself as a straight man. Life, though, isn't always quite so clear cut.
well, while not as a conscious decision, I suppose that is possible, maybe it does keep me in check. I think I feel it would have to be with the same man for a number of reasons: he is straight, he would never tell, i trust him health-wise, and his cock turns me on because it's huge... a number of reasons. the fact is, if I ever were to do this again, though, it would have to be with someone else as my friend is out of the picture, and that makes it all a LOT more difficult for me.
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See, the thing is, even if I could decide to try it once with someone else to put closure on this whole thing, I would have NO IDEA of how to even begin to go about it: the gay people I know, even assuming they might be interested, I could never go to because I would want to keep this a secret, so what do I do? Go to a stranger? One enters a whole different range of problems there...
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I haven't read the entire thread, because three pages of posts is kind of a lot, but I'm just going to give you my take based on the original post. I'm gay, I've had related-ish experiences, and I actually took a class called "human sexuality" for my psych degree. I'm not an expert by any means, but I think I'm a little bit informed to shed some light on the situation.
I don't have enough posts to post images or links, so I'll just explain this the best I can. Imagine a spectrum. On one end, you have black. On the other, you have white. In between these two color end points, you have a thousand different shades of gray. If gay is 0 and straight is 1000, you might be a 980 or 899 or something. Admittedly, I think boobs are fascinating, but I think vaginas are gross. I would probably be somewhere around 50 or 100 or something. The number doesn't matter, the point is that sexuality isn't just black and white. I realize this illustration doesn't take bisexuality or asexuality into account, but for the purpose of this post I think the visual I provided is sufficient.
If you look up homosexuality on Wikipedia, the article goes into a bunch of explanation and has references to a variety of studies. As much as 13% of people have done some sort of sexual act with others of the same gender, but relatively few people classify themselves as "gay." Without getting into the depths of what "sexual orientation," "sexual identity," "gender identity," and "relationship roles" are, just understand that there are plenty of straight people who try something with someone of the same gender. In the US, there are about 300 million people, so that means about 39 million people in the US have or will have tried something with someone of the same gender in their lifetimes.
Next point. Perhaps a reason you look at this thing that happened in the past so favorably is the thrill. I'm gay, but every now and then I think back to one of my ex-girlfriends from when I was trying to be straight. I remember how fun it was to make out in her car parked at a park at night. I have no interest in marrying a woman, and when I was single, I never pursued women as mates. But it's still thrilling to think about what she and I used to do. You may consider it taboo or unacceptable for you to do anything with another man, and that's what makes it so exciting sometimes. What you have is a unique, memorable sexual experience. It's hard to explain, but I think that could be an explanation.
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