09-05-2011, 09:31 PM
Thank you (most of you:redface for your responses. It seems that my feelings were right; gentle and caring, building a guy up and making him feel loved and wanted... and attractive. That is what I try to do, crude stuff would be uncomfortable for both of us. i suppose it is about building confidence and trust, and maybe I underestimated how long this can take. You're right- a life time of negative comments cut deep.
I'm not with anyone right now, but I feel this was an issue within my last break up, a short lived but intense relationship (not sexually). I always felt he just thought he wasn't good enough, and that I could 'do better'. I really could not... but low self esteem runs deep, and for him, size was just part of the issue.
But oh well, it'll happen again. I jut hope this time, with time and patience, I can have full and sexual relationship with a guy I'm attracted to, in which we are both satisfied and comfortable.
As a slight a side, the issue of negative comments is something that saddens me a lot. I've been out with past partners, for someone to shout something (usually 'fatty'- people are very unimaginative) It's really awkward on a first date, I must say! The poor man was used to it, but he referred back to it many hours later, which suggests to me it still hurts a while. Hm, people are ignorant. If it wasn't for that, there would be no issue within relationships.
I'm glad we're all different too, Marshlander. It is good that people find different things attractive, because we ARE all different. But we can still all find love and be loved
I'm not with anyone right now, but I feel this was an issue within my last break up, a short lived but intense relationship (not sexually). I always felt he just thought he wasn't good enough, and that I could 'do better'. I really could not... but low self esteem runs deep, and for him, size was just part of the issue.
But oh well, it'll happen again. I jut hope this time, with time and patience, I can have full and sexual relationship with a guy I'm attracted to, in which we are both satisfied and comfortable.
As a slight a side, the issue of negative comments is something that saddens me a lot. I've been out with past partners, for someone to shout something (usually 'fatty'- people are very unimaginative) It's really awkward on a first date, I must say! The poor man was used to it, but he referred back to it many hours later, which suggests to me it still hurts a while. Hm, people are ignorant. If it wasn't for that, there would be no issue within relationships.
I'm glad we're all different too, Marshlander. It is good that people find different things attractive, because we ARE all different. But we can still all find love and be loved