Sorry to hear your news, Colin. You've received excellent counsel already, so I'll just wish your partner's friend, his fiancée and her kids all the best.
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I just decided not to attend my friends first divorce 6 months after he married. I also ignored his next 2 divorces. Forty years later we are still pretty good friends, I enjoy it when he puts his hand on my knee, I smile, say nothing and simply nod no. I politely lift his hand and talk sports. I remind him there are lot more girls in the ocean I ain't your lover boy. You made your choice.
Colinmackay, it is your friends choice. Just live through it and salvage as much friendship as you can. The rest is history, just let it go. It happened to me 43 years ago, I still know I loved him then and now not so much. I simply pretend to be strait to remind him about how I felt.
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Yeah, be there for him if and when he needs a friend to turn to.....hate to say it, but it'll probably be a matter a time before he realizes he's making a bad decision. He'll need people to be there for him when that time comes. May the power of compassion guide him.
Also, let him know that there are Christian churches out there love him just as he is (Metropolitan Community Church, most United Church of Christs, etc), gay or straight. If he believes in Christ-as-savior, it's probably good to start in a place where Christ believes in you as much as you do in him.
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