pellaz Wrote:Catholics will accept the closeted image of me. A gay can only attend church as a hypocrite.
-plant that big gay kiss on your partner up front the so your congregation can see ... no.
-lets hold hands, me and the boy friend in church as they ask me to leave.
i have a partner, friends and a life that i live as a gay man.
everyone has their belief system, i can pick any one of a thousand junk religions.
I agree about attending as a hypocrite. Now I am sure there are some exceptions out there. I'm sure there are some churches that don't condemn homosexuality. Or I say this more out of hope then anything else.
I was not raised in any Church and went maybe twice growing up when we stayed with family friends who were big on Church. I was big on going to Church in late high school and after high school. I enjoyed it, it was fun, I met a lot of great people.
But as I struggled to accept myself as gay I knew where those Churches stood on the issue and I didn't attend for a long time. Now that I've finally accepted myself completely and am very happy doing so I do miss churches and wanted to go back. I went to a decent number of Churches here in San Diego and they either were against homosexuality or they were "ok" with it ... as long as you didn't act on it. Even a big church here in San Diego, the Rock church has a group that meets weekly for gay and lesbian members, I went to my first meeting and I got the same impression.
First, I noticed how really a lot of people there were not real happy, they seemed to have a strong sense of guilt and conflict going on in there life. Then as I listened and we prayed I noticed that in fact yes, they were fine with you being gay, as long as you don't act on it sexually.
So I have not been back sense. I spent SO LONG in the closet lying and hiding who I was and now that I am finally out and happy and have accepted myself completely I absolutely, completely, TOTALLY refuse to lie, hide, or pretend to be someone I'm not. Absolutely refuse.
On a side note though it is sad, my parents think, because of the depression I had since 7th grade (mainly because I was gay and didn't want to be and hiding it and who I was) they think that going to church and getting involved in it will help me. I've tried to explain to them, and some of my friends who feel the same way, that I just can't. If I go into a Church and they say homosexuality is a sin, or that it's okay to be gay, just don't act on it sexually, that I get that same strong, deep, horrible feeling inside me that I am a bad person, I am wrong, I need to go back into hiding and fight myself on this. Not going to do it, I get a strong sense of anger inside me when this happens and right away shut down and say no, this is NOT for me. It's a little strange to me that my family and friends don't understand that. It seems like common sense to me to feel as though I shouldn't have to hide who I am to attend a Church but I tried to explain it but i can't... oh well...