How come no one seems to last at GaySpeak.com for more tan a few hundred posts?

[Inchante]

Well, I don't think its always for everyone. There are many different personalities and views, but we still may not be able to accommodate everyone. I also think that some people come here, get advice, and leave when they have it. 99% people on here are very caring toward those seeking advice: they offer an ear, they actually listen/read what the person is saying and give the best advice that their own knowledge and experience allows . . . (forgive me for this soap box moment) but there is that other 1% of the time when people will come here confused, afraid, and looking for advice, and if they happen to say something that is disliked by the members, the members will shred that person like a pack of rabid wolves.

I can think of a recent case like that where a new member was confused about his sexuality, said if he was gay, he didn't think he would ever act on it because he never wanted that lifestyle. He made that one post and never posted again after the severe trouncing he received. That could have been the first time he opened up about his confusion and his first real experience with the gay community. If he is gay, that experience had to be traumatizing.

Now, heaven knows I'm one for giving a good trouncing but not to those who are confused, hurt, or in any other way seeking support. I just feel bad that I didn't speak up at the time. It was cowardly of me, and I regret it. (There, sorry about the rant, just had to get it off my chest)

[72jay]

I've been a member here for a couple years & although I don't post a ton, I generally check the forum regularly...
I haven't been around here much lately for 2 main reasons:
* I joined another forum fairly recently, & since I'm new there I've been spending more time on that one...
* Since a number of things no longer work here (mainly in the home page) I've also spent less time...

[ToddYoung]

I'm spending more time here and posting less. I don't know why. I often feel reluctant to give advice to others when I feel that I'm really not in a position to do that. I suppose I ought to put my point of view in, but in the past week or so I think I've spent an hour or more on the site every day, have read all of the recent posts, and have said very little.

Anyway, posting here now, I ought to say that I like your attitude, Wes.

[mrk2010]

Honestly I don't know, I don't think I'll be leaving anytime soon, I really like Gayspeak and since joining in July I really support it. Its a very caring community and I have made some good friends here so I'm staying :-)

[Genersis]

I think there are gangs of members going around and intimidating those who do not agree with them.

I...don't.:confused:

[Pix]

Just out of curiosity, has anyone here been intimidated? (Remember, you can share anonymously if you wish, at least if you've posted 50 times.)

I personally haven't experienced that, and I've shared some contrary opinions before (though I always try to be nice, reasonable, and respectful when I do).

ETA: I've been looking and I can't find any "infractions" section on my account. I did learn about "reputation" but I can't find that I have any (unless that green mark means I have good rep instead of meaning I'm online, but if so I can't find the details of my good rep).

[mrk2010]

I think members here get bored. I think some members try to dominate the forum using the ability of EVERY MEMBER to issue infractions (read anyone's profile information under "Infractions"). We are adults here we do not need a battle of infractions as payback for losing a thread.

I think there are gangs of members going around and intimidating those who do not agree with them. I for one plan to put a stop to that type of bulling, by informing members in this thread of what I observe. This is a method of self-policing. I hope EVERY MEMBER will bring their complaints to this thread, so we can address them as a group.

To my knowledge there is no boss here, and it is the responsibility of all of us to keep GaySpeak.com the kind of community we can all be proud of. We need to nail the bullies, once and for all. One person, one vote. With the power to issue "infractions" each of us is a "boss."
.

To an extent I totally disagree, I have never witnessed any bullying on gayspeak really, there might be the odd troll who comes on who wants to start something but apart from that I think we are a really good online community compared to other sites. As for there being a boss there is, his name is Andy and he is the all powerful gayspeak god who keeps the cogs turning. mile:

[Rawr]

I've been here since early 2009 as ~D5~ & Dark Angel. I deleted my account in order to focus on my coursework etc... which didn't work. I was back within a week or two. I could probably get into the top ten posters if I were to spam like I use to a couple years back, but I wouldn't want to disrupt the flow of the forum. This forum is awesome.

[East]

My 47 year old mentor told me that before AIDS you made regular runs to the clinic, got a shot, and forgot about STDs. I think we would all like to see those days return.

Not a bad idea really but it never occurred to me because when i was 20 I got a letter from the clinic that told me I had been exposed to syphilis. The thing was...when someone got a venereal disease and got treated for it in the 1970s they were required to list their sexual partners and it was all anonymous so I tried to figure out who entered my name but I couldn't because I had a few too many guys to pick from:biggrin:

What happened was you went in and they gave you a test and you couldnt' get the results for a few weeks so they made you watch a half hour long movie that showed the dangers of syphilis which included really GROSS pictures and they showed you this long ass scary needle that would have to go up your spine and was really painful if you did in fact have syphilis and not get immediate treatment.

Well...up to that day I could never swallow pills...I had to mash them up even when taking an aspirin so I was shocked to see a group of 12 or 13 horse sized pills that were to be my treatment "just in case" I had syphilis. I looked at the pills and then I thought about the needle...back and forth...but I was too embarrassed to tell the doctor I couldn't swallow pills so I just did what I do when I am really scared...I Said "FUCK IT" and I took a deep breath and swallowed ALL OF THEM at once!

I got a letter in the mail some weeks later...the tests showed did not have syphilis or any other venereal disease. I wondered at the time if someone was mad at you or didn;'t like you...would they turn in your name just to be an ass? I will never know.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

My 47 year old mentor told me that before AIDS you made regular runs to the clinic, got a shot, and forgot about STDs. I think we would all like to see those days return.

Not a bad idea really but it never occurred to me because when i was 20 I got a letter from the clinic that told me I had been exposed to syphilis. (truncated for length).

And there are still of the old STD's that are incurable even today:

Hepatitis B, genital herpes, Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)...

There are over 25 different STDs, some can be treated with a mere shot, others require intensive treatments, repeat visits back to doctors and often with mixed results in the Pre-HIV days.

Chlamydia reared its ugly head in the 1970's - more often than not people do nothave symptoms and spread it willy-nilly

Chlamydia, one of the most rapidly increasing STDs, affecting up to 40 percent of the population in some locations in USA, causes sterility in 25 percent of cases with its first infection, 50 percent with the second infection and 75 percent with the third infection. Over 75 percent of both men and women had no symptoms of Chlamydia infection but could readily pass it on to others);

- At least 30 percent of single sexually active Americans have been infected with Herpes (caused by Herpes Simplex II virus), and can pass it on to their partners.

- About 40 percent of single sexually active Americans have been infected with HPV, the human papilloma virus, which causes venereal warts, pre-cancerous changes and cancer to the vulva, vagina and cervix, and cancer of the penis in men (this is the most common STD with more than 90 percent of abnormal pap smears caused by the virus).

Neither of which are curable.....

Other interesting 1970's sexual diseases are found here: http://fathersforlife.org/dale/aids2.html

http://www.leaderu.com/orgs/probe/docs/epid-std.html

Saying one can just get a shot and forget about it is a terrible understatement.

Someone's Mentor either has a faulty memory about the 'good old days' or is purposefully feeding them a line of B.S.