Please help!!!

[Anonymous]

Hey Guys,

I need help in so many ways right now... So please bear with me.

I broke up with my ex in december and since then everything is spiraling out of my control. Its not just the break up. I'm stressed right now, I'm about to graduate from university and there's just so much pressure.

Things between me and my boyfriend were never very good and I ended up cheating in him. I was honest with him and we tried to work through it, but in the end neither I nor him could change enough to fix it. The guy I cheated with I ended up growing to like. Although he doesn't realize it, his life is fucked too.

I was at a party last week and met a guy. My ex was texting me all types of crap and the guy I'm semi-with wasn't replying to me. My ex was telling me he had something to do with that (which turned out to be untrue). I'd already drank to much and this guy approached me. He got me to drink more and got me by myself at the party. He gave me some pill (mdma I found out after) and I was totally out of it. We went back to his place and I'm not really sure about what happened after that.

The next day my ex asked me for some help moving his stuff into his new place. He had a job interview too and guilted me into coming over. I was still intoxicated and sleep deprived at this point. I got there and helped him with his stuff. I was gonna leave then but he jumped me and we ended up having sex. We both fell asleep and when I woke up I felt like crap. I wanted to meet up with the guy I'm supposed to be with now and tell him what happened so I texted him to meet up.

He wasn't replying to texts so I went to message him on facebook but and saw some messages that I didn't write. I asked my ex and he told me he'd hacked my facebook while I was sleeping and wrote them. There were some answered calls on my phone, so I'm presuming my ex and the new guy also talked. I can't get through to the new guy now, he isn't talking to me.

I've started drinking a lot and am out of it most of the time the last few days... This is a moment of clarity for me.

I feel like I'm cracking under the pressure. Before December if you asked me if I'd ever cheat on someone, I'd have said no. All of my actions are just making things worse and I have so much other stuff on my plate right now. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to fix anything. I don't know where to begin, where to start.

Somebody please help,

[Almac]

Hey Guys,

I need help in so many ways right now... So please bear with me.

I broke up with my ex in december and since then everything is spiraling out of my control. Its not just the break up. I'm stressed right now, I'm about to graduate from university and there's just so much pressure.Somebody please help,

[SIZE="3"][COLOR="DarkSlateBlue"]Right lets start by saying your graduation is the most important thing at the moment for you, you've probably worked hard to get where you are now so please believe me if you mess this up, you will regret this for a long time to come.

Relationships can come and go, and in five years time you will look back and wonder what all the fuss was about? Don't get me wrong, when relationships break up that is so painful, but as you said, your relationship was not that good in the first place. So take my advice, try to relax (easy said than done) and take stock of what you've got, do you want to graduate or do you want to fail because you are so consumed with regret and pain? It's your career your future depends on your graduation... That's my advice take it or leave it??? [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[jbrowder24]

Unfortunatley we can't always control things, and sometimes life sucks when you make a mistake, or when you lose somebody even through no fault of your own. I do hope that you are able to talk to the new guy and at least clear up that your boyfriend hacked your account, and clear up what messages were yours. And in terms of cheating, it sounds like you were slipped something, so you should be honest about your suspicions and about not remembering things. Your new guy might understand that it was more akin to rape than cheating. Either way, you should all be tested to be on the safe side.

If you can at all resolve things, even if it means being single, I'd do it sooner than later though. If there is anything you can drop, look into that too. I didn't have all the guy drama, but did find myself overbooked as I was leaving and had anxiety attacks. I regret that I wasn't able to truly enjoy those last couple months with friends (some of whom I have not seen since as life took us in different directions) as well as not preparing better for the job world (and given the sucky economy, that part is more important than ever). If you and this guy end up resolving things, great, but maybe it's time to focus on you?