i hope this helps but its your decision and there is no rush unless you make it that way.
Zet Wrote:... my mother is very liberal and hippie'ish
my father always have been ratter disciplined, never gay bashing from him but he think a man gotta be a man, like a woman gotta be a woman
My brother on the other hand is ratter homophobic
many of my friend.
-lots of people come out to their mothers before their father. your parents might feel un comfortable keeping secrets from each other. You might talk to her first than the same day your dad.
-your dad should be made to know you are still the same person even tho you are out to him. You might begin the conversation with him; review your aspirations. Not a lot of information here but maybe a good way to start. You being gay dosnt necessary define you at school or work. It defines your sexual preference, which is none of his business but you would like to know his support is there if you need it.
-Your brother ... most homophobic boys are unsure about their sexuality. Maybe you coming out will be something of role model but not any immediate good news for you. Suggestion; you might have this conversation with him while you are driving and he is the passenger. You appear in control of the conversation. Your mother could help here too.
-If your friends are unwilling to support/ accept you they are not friends. Before you come out look for a new support group. Slowly divest your self of the current crowd, so you not left hanging.
Most parents and people close to you may already know more than you think. Your parents compare you to brother. Your brother and friends compare too.
In some ways its un fair not letting these people not know who you are.
A supportive house hold can give you lots more strength in your life. These things are good but you dont have to come out right now.