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Crushing on a friend fml
#1
I am crushing hard on a new friend of mine and I would much rather just be friends. I know he is attracted to me as he has told me and we messed around. I really hate it and would really like to just have a new friend. I don't want to jump into a relationship anytime soon as I would like to be alone to sort things out. I just got out of a long term relationship so i would like to give myself time. I have been super depressed lately and this might be one of the factors. I have felt so lonely and sad lately, Today and yesterday I drove around for a few hours and got dinner alone and just felt like such a loser. Driving around the city with no where to go and no one to talk to. I cried a few times as well and I feel like I would be better off dead although I know that is selfish and stupid of me.

I have just been really sad lately and I wish my friends were there for me, but it seems they are all too busy. I don't blame them. I have just reached a really low point and would like to turn it around, but I can't seem to shake the depressing feelings.

If this doesn't make perfect sense it is because I am quite drunk at the current moment. I hate how drunkenness makes certain things clear. I should have stayed home tonight and just been miserable. I had fun and met some new people as well as another cute boy >< I don't know what I am doing anymore and I would just like to be happy again...

Thanks ahead of time if you actually read this. I know I seem to ask a lot from ya'll and seem really depressing and I am sorry for this. I am just at a really low point in my life. I think I am going to cry again =(

I drove home drunk and saw 3 cops... I am lucky =/
#2
If you need somebody to talk to.
You can always add me as a friend and I will send you a private message with my
phone number. I just took some adderall, so I have nothing but time and patience.
We are all made of the same organic material, I am here for you.
#3
Crying is good. And don't be sorry for asking for advice. It's a big part of this forum to be able to ask for help from honest harts.

Ok here is my thoughts. I think you need to talk this guy and tell him how it is and how you are felling.
I know that it feels like your friends are too occupied for you but I don't think they are, try and talk to one of them who you know will be ready to lend an ear and a sholder (they are there and you know who). And stop with drinking cos it dosen't help it makes you sadder. And drink driving boy please retrain yourself next time not only can it be dangrous for you but for other people driving.

Words. Talking. Friend and sholder.
#4
I entirely agree with Kiid on this one. For one, you need to be honest with this guy and forget him as a 'possible man' in your life or 'target' (if ya know what I mean), just make it friends, if you can't handle that, then forget him altogether. I'd also recommend attempting to change your outlook so that you think of no one as a candidate so to speak for a relationship... try just living as you for a while, remind yourself what makes you happy about living as an individual, not as a member of a relationship. Ultimately learn to be happy with yourself before you seek out another man to make happy... and when you're feeling this down, like Kiid said, you've got friends out there, you just have to connect with them, and if they tell you they're too busy, let them know how seriously low you feel and how important it is for you to make this contact.

...is what I'd suggest. Hope this helps, and don't apologize for being at a low point in your life, we all hit them from time to time, this forum is always here to gather people willing to help one another out.

Bighug
#5
Hello there,
Firstly drink wont tackle your problems... Things may seem clear on drink because it is in itself a depressor factor... Be in control of your life at all times... Having a meal alone or going out alone isnt a bad thing which people make it out to be because ME TIME can be very important to recovering from something like a break up... l know that in time your heart will mend... One piece of advice ill offer for a break up is.... Do you love your ex enough to let him go??? If so allow him to move on on a mutual thing and maybe work things out together to work on a possible friendship because why do relationships need to turn sour when a relationship starts as a friendship first?

Next thing is dont drink and drive for gods sake because if you get nicked your not going to feel any better when your standing in the dock in a court faced with drink driving possibly causing dangerous driving or even death to an innocent by stander... If you consume more than 2 units i suggest to you you do not drive and base 1 unit as 1 hour to work out your system so if u drink 8 units and feel pissed then wait eight hours before driving again as i know with me my limit is 4 before im light headed 6 before im wasted...

Whats caused the low point in your life??? If your friends wont be there for ya we will be Smile If u need to talk feel free to speak with us here... or if u want to talk to someone on a 121 basis feel free to message me

kindest regards

zeon x
#6
well drinking doesnt make things clear, its actually a depressant so it can make matters worse if your allready struggling. Been depressed and coming out of your long term relationship has prob help bring things to a head and its time to open up to someone, hopefully a doctor about your illness, which depression is - in the uk we've just had a famous football legend hang himself through depression and he looked like he was so happy too - it really is time to get help mate if u have suicidal thoughts - why not explain to this new guy the situation, im sure he'll understand that you want to get things together in your mind before starting to get serious with someone again - good luck and please post back to say how ur goin
#7
getting out of a relationship it takes a bit to think for yourself. Somehow you were able to do this before the relationship. I think its fine, maybe a must do thing, to whore around for a while and establish a new sense of self worth.
-be truthful with your self and the boys you meet, tell them you just getting over a relationship and dont want to start another just yet. You may have to repeat this several times to the same person as they are un willing to accept your un availability. The smart one will hang in there till your done and be there for you when you can emotionally accept him.
-set some sort of time limit
-re start whatever activities in your life before the failed relationship.
#8
I am doing much better this morning, but we shall see how long that lasts. Last night I decided that I should try to have a positive outlook on life even if I feel like crap. That is what I will be working on for the time being. I just don't enjoy it when most of my buds are busy because then I just sit at home and feel miserable.

I might try to talk to the guy, but I feel like he is avoiding me(he is probably just busy). I am just going to try not talking to him for awhile to see if I can cool down and slow down my life. I should also try to get a job this semester to keep myself busy and somewhat active.

Thanks for reading guys.
#9
youd be surprised how much a job can really make you think better. i was in a state of uber depression in october, than i got a job and suddenly i just started thingking clearly. please be safe. you sound like a really sweet guy in a hard place! Dont let the MAN get you DOWN. even if your sad wake up in the morning and practice that smile in the mirror and one day- one day that smile will win over someone really dear.
[Image: sdfg_by_cocoaeyes-d6waj25.png]


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