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Fame or Love?
#1
I am dealing with a complex issue, and I assume most people on this forum are intelligent and I literally just search “support” forum. I am a senior in high school right now. Anyways, I am engaged but my fiancé does not fully support my music career that I rather envision (it’s not going anywhere). I love him, but I am more concentrated on that career because I want to become a celebrity. I have the image in my head, and the type of music and how I will achieve this all. If this is geeky the music is in electronic-pop-with a bunch of random genres combine with rave. I am marrying my fiancé for his current money (1 million) and his future money (millions), he comes from wealth, and going to pay for college.

In addition, in philosophy final exam today, I rather wrote, “blah blah I am going to become a role model for all people who felt weird, blah blah change the world, blah blah make a million dollars or pursue”, basically the underline meaning was that I was going to get famous. Since the exam was about what you learn from the class, and knowing if I did became famous my teacher would have this essay, so it would make good fan news. It is marketing. I got the life story to make me famous, and I written that essay to make me a gay icon like the other pop stars. I written another one similar to that for my English exam too, but that was more focus on religion and crap.
Still, somewhat embarrassed I wrote that, but it is worth it if I make it to the big time. Then I went to sleep had a dream telling me to go for the music career and ask my boyfriend what he thinks…

I did, then he said, “I don’t want you to do that, where do I fit in with that? I’ll decide what you become, and you’re going to college (he’s paying going to pay for it; he’s 40 yrs old too)”.
So I was like, “I need to go to porn and become a star and afford my own ambitions”, but then I have financial security with him, I might make a huge mistake if I do that since he’s coming to 1 million bucks.

So here’s the options I have
A) Dump the boyfriend; pursue music/celebrity career
B) Married the boyfriend; go to college, and live financially secure

It’s an either/or situation, the hard road is A since I am taking a big plunge with my life, and might fall to disaster. But B I would be unhappy because I didn’t pursue the dream. I have to get before 25, since after 25 I am too old for it.

This is in a state where gay marriages are legal. I will go to New York to do it.

And the funny thing is, the chances of me making it big is huge, and getting a huge fan base is also huge.
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#2
What does your "gut" tell you? Whatever it is...listen to it.

Remember though....if it is your gut (soul/spirit) you wish to follow you may not be able to control where your path will lead...fame may not be the ultimate destination....you should prepare yourself.
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#3
I'm not sure if my reply is going to classify as intelligent by your standards.

I think you need to take a good look in the mirror. It is WRONG to use someone as you are proposing. If you truly care for someone, "love" as you say, you would understand that you value their emotional and physical well being. You treat them with respect. You don't use someone for their money or status or what they will give you. You want to give to them.

Similarly, you say that your bf wants to dictate what you should do. He sounds controlling and maybe you need to break up with him as you should never allow someone to control you. The whole situation doesn't sound very good for you. I'm sorry but it comes across as the beginnings of an abusive relationship.

You want to be a role model but honestly, there is nothing in your outlook that I would want a young person to emulate. Respect has to be earned. Change the world with goodness.

I also think you need to separate reality from delusion. If you want to do well in any field you have to have talent in the area and a work ethic. I cannot really understand what you are saying, are you saying you have a huge fanbase already? I guess you would need to provide me with some #s.

So, short answer, I would go with A. You need to stand on your own two feet and sink or swim on your own merits.
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#4
azulai Wrote:I'm not sure if my reply is going to classify as intelligent by your standards.

I think you need to take a good look in the mirror. It is WRONG to use someone as you are proposing. If you truly care for someone, "love" as you say, you would understand that you value their emotional and physical well being. You treat them with respect. You don't use someone for their money or status or what they will give you. You want to give to them.

Similarly, you say that your bf wants to dictate what you should do. He sounds controlling and maybe you need to break up with him as you should never allow someone to control you. The whole situation doesn't sound very good for you. I'm sorry but it comes across as the beginnings of an abusive relationship.

You want to be a role model but honestly, there is nothing in your outlook that I would want a young person to emulate. Respect has to be earned. Change the world with goodness.

I also think you need to separate reality from delusion. If you want to do well in any field you have to have talent in the area and a work ethic. I cannot really understand what you are saying, are you saying you have a huge fanbase already? I guess you would need to provide me with some #s.

So, short answer, I would go with A. You need to stand on your own two feet and sink or swim on your own merits.

It is wrong in a moral sense, but I been too poor to really care about that aspect of marrying him for money. I just want his wealth and the college route if he will give me that, but I will lose control since he is a controlling man. He made that cleared about the relationship, and I am fine with that, so there's really no fighting or "abuse". I am just playing the game, and so far if I get what I want "a decent life, a future" I am fine. He's the safe route.

Now, when it comes to my fame dream it isn't as fine, since that's what I want more than anything else. And it's more important to me than anything else.

I am not a role model for morals, but I want to change society with homosexuality and all those prejudices. I also want to make pornography more mainstream, since everyone does it.

Well I know it's hard work, but the work and the product isn't my issue, it's the least of my issues really. I don't have a lot of talent either, but I think I can have enough to be better than average. I am focusing more on my image for the 1st yr in porn, and the 2nd yr I aim to produce some stuff and work the clubs.

It's all kind of easy from there on.

I do have one fan already, but just one.

Are you a Tony? I just sense that from you.
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#5
personally, i'd choose fame. cause in the long run, that would be prove to be one of the rarest things you'll ever have. there's too many oppurtunities for love but fame? nah....
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#6
That settles it, I am going after fame... Give it a long hard thought right now.

But he will only be getting 1 million, and I have to sacrifice myself/wants for only a quarter of it, if not less. It's not like I will get control over his finances, but in the long run it's our money... but still it's not worth it.

I am going to focus on this completely, and make sure it happens then.
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#7
LoveGame Wrote:Are you a Tony? I just sense that from you.
LMAO.

Smoke just pours out my ears when someone thinks it's nothing to use someone or take advantage of someone. Guess I'm just not into the game.

Best of luck! Pinkies out!
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#8
The question your asking is more:
Possible Fame and Money or Deffinate Money in a possibly unhappy relationship?

And to be honest. I wouldn't go for either.
But if i must pick. I'd say possible fame and money. As i'd be true to feelings. Rather than marry a guy for his money, which could hurt us both.

I really can't see how you are willing to marry a guy for his money. It makes little sense to me.
If you're not in a marriage for "Love". It just isn't going to last. What if he devorces you? Or you get tired of the relationship and decide to get a devorce yourself? I find it unlikely that you will keep much of that money he has.

You said you love him. But it sounds to me that he's just a tool to you, easy money. Sorry if that sounded harsh.:redface:

And on a side note. Don't get too confidant. There's no guarentee you'll become famous.
You should have a fallback plan. A Plan B if the fame route doesn't panout.
Silly Sarcastic So-and-so
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#9
Genersis Wrote:The question your asking is more:
Possible Fame and Money or Deffinate Money in a possibly unhappy relationship?

And to be honest. I wouldn't go for either.
But if i must pick. I'd say possible fame and money. As i'd be true to feelings. Rather than marry a guy for his money, which could hurt us both.

I really can't see how you are willing to marry a guy for his money. It makes little sense to me.
If you're not in a marriage for "Love". It just isn't going to last. What if he devorces you? Or you get tired of the relationship and decide to get a devorce yourself? I find it unlikely that you will keep much of that money he has.

You said you love him. But it sounds to me that he's just a tool to you, easy money. Sorry if that sounded harsh.:redface:

And on a side note. Don't get too confidant. There's no guarentee you'll become famous.
You should have a fallback plan. A Plan B if the fame route doesn't panout.

Well it's really not unhappy. We love each other in a weird way, it's not that I don't love him, but I am more focus on fame. He decided not to get a prenup, since he believes we are going to be together forever. I am marrying him for his money since money is needed to survive in society.

Possible fame, yeah.... it's probably not that possible unless I do porn though.

Eh. Going to sleep on this more.
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#10
azulai Wrote:LMAO.

Smoke just pours out my ears when someone thinks it's nothing to use someone or take advantage of someone. Guess I'm just not into the game.

Best of luck! Pinkies out!

What? So that's a no. You just reminded me of this guy I know who is named Tony.

I guess it's not you though.
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