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Help a gay guy in love out
#1
Hello everyone,
So I met this gay guy through a friend and now I have a huge crush on him. He knows I'm gay as well. I'm 18 he's 21. For now, he considers me as a friend, and to be honest I haven't done anything so far to show that I'm interested in something more than friendship, and this is why I decided to post here, because I don't know how to make him know about my interest in him without me telling him straightforwadly about my feelings. Should I use some specific signs with my body to make him know about it (like stare at him in a different way and smile or idk..) basically how can you tell that a gay guy has feeling for you?
When a friend asked him about me, he said he finds me really interesting. He never had a bf and he said to regret it a lot. Neither I have so I reaaally lack experience.
(I considered just telling him, but the idea of being rejected is so frustrating)
So I'm really in need of your advices. Sorry if I sounded corny.
#2
Keep it simple, no drama.
Do you want to get coffee sometime, just us?
#3
That is adorable. Smile

Feelings is maybe a bit too early to start talking about, interest is a more appropriate word. Staring at someone in a ''different'' way or/and for longer time stretches is just confusing for people (unless you are very familiar and comfortable with each other). Forget the staring. Show interest in him. You like him, so talk to him about what he likes and wants, and try to get to spend time with him together.

Touch is an excellent way to express that you like him. I encourage you to use that. Or learn how to use it. It's a very important skill with men.

Or you could just be bold and ask him to go out with you. So that there's no confusion.

Quote:(I considered just telling him, but the idea of being rejected is so frustrating)

I get it. When I was 18 I tended to think that to be the first to express interest in another was the most terrifying thing in the world to do, and that I would never put myself out there like that. Luckily I learned that I was wrong; and to act on my attractions turned out to be one of the most exhilarating experiences I can ever get from anything.

Don't be hesitant to show that you're interested in another guy. It's a natural, benign process everyone goes through. And there's nothing wrong in being interested in another. You don't have to do it by verbally declaring your feelings for him straight up (probably not a good idea), you have to be more subtle about it. Which is most likely why it's so confusing to young guys who haven't had much experience, but you'll learn as you go along. And you'll get the hang of it. And, trust me, it's totally worth it.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
#4
meridannight Wrote:Don't be hesitant to show that you're interested in another guy. It's a natural, benign process everyone goes through. And there's nothing wrong in being interested in another. You don't have to do it by verbally declaring your feelings for him straight up (probably not a good idea), you have to be more subtle about it. Which is most likely why it's so confusing to young guys who haven't had much experience, but you'll learn as you go along. And you'll get the hang of it. And, trust me, it's totally worth it.

^^^THIS

And honestly? The worst he can say is no, right? Is it really that bad? People hear no all the time, about lots of different things. It isnt the end of the world, nor is he the last man on the planet.
[Image: Signature500.jpg][Image: Signature502.jpg]
#5
Just ask him straight out if he wants to go with you to a caffee house or something. Start small, work your way up to a dinner date.
Seeing as he has told your friend that he thinks you're really interesting and mentions that he hasn't had a bf. I'm thinking he might want to try being your bf.
#6
Thank you all so much for replying,
I guess asking him out is my only solution. I forgot to mention we go to the same college ( and it's where I met him ), so he has maaany friends here because he's a senior, wouldn't it annoy him to let his friends to sit with a newcomer instead ? We only had dinner once together but it was with our mutual friend that introduced us to each other. Also, we haven't spoken for a while, so I hope it wouldn't sound weird when I'll ask him out next time I meet him around ?
#7
Life it too short m8. Go for it. You'll just regret not asking him out.

Maybe chat with him some bit before popping the question though.
But if you still want to ask him out after chatting for a bit, DO IT!
#8
bodylanguage Wrote:Thank you all so much for replying,
I guess asking him out is my only solution. I forgot to mention we go to the same college ( and it's where I met him ), so he has maaany friends here because he's a senior, wouldn't it annoy him to let his friends to sit with a newcomer instead ? We only had dinner once together but it was with our mutual friend that introduced us to each other. Also, we haven't spoken for a while, so I hope it wouldn't sound weird when I'll ask him out next time I meet him around ?

It's not high school (or the British equivalent.) He's an adult, you are making your way there. His friends shouldn't have a problem meeting someone new, or get bent out of shape if he's sitting with just you.

Don't overthink things. Ask him if he'd like to do something you both would like doing. Movie, dinner, coffee, go for a bike ride... whatever. The activity is less important than doing it together.

Don't take crushes to seriously. It's basically your emotions getting the better of you.
Those who have HATE in their heart are HATEFUL PEOPLE
#9
TigerLover Wrote:Keep it simple, no drama.
Do you want to get coffee sometime, just us?

Totally agree with this.

LOL DO NOT stare, you want to come off as interested, not as a stalker.

And also, try not to overthink this and worry about how it will look, what friends will think, etc. These things have a way of working themselves out.

Good luck! Bee
"That's just the way it is
Some things will never change
That's just the way it is
Ah, but don't you believe them..."
~~~~~~~~Bruce Hornsby,, "That's Just The Way It Is"
#10
One more question please, if I ask him out and he accepts, is it enough for him to get my interest towards him ? Or should I try working it out during the "date" ? Any ideas for me what to do when will get to our appointment ?
Thank you all again


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