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Just Came Out of the Closet- Need Advice
#1
Hello, I've finally discovered (more or less) my true self, and thus I am coming out of the closet, and where better to do it then on a forum of others who know the feeling? I always did feel... different sexually, I did things other boys didn't, when I watched (straight) porn I felt a bit out of place, like something was missing. However I did manage to find it out, through My Little Pony: Friendship is magic, if you haven't watched the show, you should, it's absolutely amazing. So I really have that show to thank for my epiphany. There's just one real problem I'm having, I host a radio station, and my co-worker, (Let's just call him "The Engineer") well... let's just say I have feelings for him, how should I show it to him?
#2
hello and welcome to GS.

It's great that you have discovered who you are and it can be extremely difficult to come out to someone, but I don't think it would be a good idea to show The Engineer that you have feelings for him. at least not yet. do you know if he is gay friendly? the thing I would be concerned about the most would be your private info being leaked on the air.

The first thing I would do is come out to a few more people (including the engineer) and see where things go from there.
#3
the gay population varies but its between 3 and 8% of the general flock so low probability anyone you meet at work is gay single man.

Obvious its bad to mix you home life and work. I am out at work. I still have to find a way to mix with everyone on the team. Usually tell the new co-worker directly who i am and my expectations. Usually along the lines... "I am a gay man and I am telling you because you might have expected it and or you will hear it from the rumor mill... "

The day I outed myself I went to the company rumor mill person and told her to tell everyone i am gay, no bit deal.

There are 4 gay men at the company (~200 employees).

It always leads to complications having a crush on a straight co worker and there are actually many eligible and willing gay boy friends to pick from, all of them outside work. I would hate that any of the household drama would follow me into work the next morning. You think the fist gay boy ( if a co worker) you meet will be your husband?
#4
My godness,,,,,, whats with all this Coming Out nonsense nowadays,,,,,, this is the 21st century for goodness sake,,,,man up toots an get on with your life,,,, theres more help out ther and in here than there was for me 30 years ago,,,, and Im a well adjusted individual......
#5
Now days more often than not a person announces 'I'm gay' and most people will go:

"And?"

MOST (not all) people no longer care, coming out is not the big deal it was 10, 20 years ago.

However you still need to be careful, the few that are not 'ok' with it tend to get a gang of other like minded individuals and decide to teach you to be straight.... Granted that is illegal, carrying special sentencing (Hate Crime Laws) but still no amount of laws keep people from stealing, committing rape, committing murder, etc.

You need to first get yourself a group of like minded individuals- peers, who can support you and stand behind you when you start the process of coming out to people in your life.

I definitely would not suggest coming out to the Engineer at this time, unless you know he is gay friendly.
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[SIZE=4]I told you I had the body of a 25 year old....

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#6
Congrats for coming out and acknowledging what you are. It seems in the beginning there are mixed feelings about announcing it - at times you just want to hide and at times you just want to scream at the top of your lungs that you are gay, no matter the repercussions.

Take the advice of those above me who have been through it and best of luck and happy thoughts.
#7
Kaybee Wrote:My godness,,,,,, whats with all this Coming Out nonsense nowadays,,,,,, this is the 21st century for goodness sake,,,,man up toots an get on with your life ...
all a good point:
dont loose your common sense after coming out, you will still need it next few years.

Kaybee Wrote:... and Im a well adjusted individual......
chime in and contribute, time permitting.
#8
Hello! Glad to hear that you've found YOU in your life! It's hard sometimes for people to admit that, yeah. I'm gay! And I've gone through all these stages too so I know you well! Anyway, I would say that, if you really have feelings on him, maybe you can try to go out with him, to talk to him, and try to know him more and give him some SIGNALS... but if he looks FINE after all the signals..maybe you can start to ask him about relationship...
#9
Congrats and welcome.Confusedmile:


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