@Tjemka88

I'm not sure how many sites there are like this one, so in a way we are all learning. It sounds like you have had an eventful life. I hope you find it good to be able to take part in the discussions here. Your flag suggests you are from Latvia (?) although I found a VPN can locate us in other places when Andy introduced the feature. Although there are a number of Lithuanian people in the town nearest me at the moment I know very little about any of the Baltic states. If you felt able to say more I'm sure some of us would be interested to find out more about life where you are. I also understand that you may wish to remain more private too.

Welcome here @"Tjemka88." Feel free to join in. We like new friends.

Hi and welcome

I am from Latvia, but I can't say anything good about it when it comes to our community. It's probably the most homophobic Baltic country of them all.

(05-25-2020, 08:00 AM)Tjemka88 Wrote: I am from Latvia, but I can't say anything good about it when it comes to our community. It's probably the most homophobic Baltic country of them all.

That definitely sounds difficult. It sounds like Latvia ignores EU requirements regarding human rights like Poland does with its increasing number of so-called LGBT-free zones. What is the driving force for this homophobia? Is it the Orthodox church as in Russia? I assume it is not Islam as in Chechnya. I have attended many vigils outside the Russian Embassy in London to try and bring attention to what's going on in Russia and Chechnya and from time to time I contribute money to the fund to try and keep an escape route open. Is Latvia a dangerous place for LGBT+? Could your family turn a mob on you?

No, fortunately, it's not as dangerous as Russia or Iran or something. Physical attacks are rare to none but there have been cases of parents disowning their kids because of them being gay. Throughout the whole country there is basically "don't ask, don't tell policy". PDA is a huge no-no.

And it's in your own best interest to keep silent. If you're openly gay, you might get verbally bullied in your school or job and there will definitely be a lot of people who'll turn their backs at you even if you were good friends previously. If your potential employer finds out about your sexuality, you might not get hired. Gay celebrities are getting an enormous amount of dirt on them in the internet comments.

It's difficult to tell what's the driving force for it is. Religion is surely one of the reasons, most Latvians are Christians and use the Bible to defend their reasons for disliking gays. Also, people see homosexuality as something that destroys the "traditional values" and strongly insist that only a man and a woman is a family. Latvians in their core simply are very stereotypical, old-fashioned and ignorant people, and anything that's out of the frames of their common lifestyle, is seen as weird, wrong, and bad.

We also do have Pride parades every now and then. They're very small and getting a lot of backlashes. One year there was shit thrown at the participants, actual feces. The government is also full of homophobes, same-sex marriage legalization has been turned down many times and it's unlikely to change.

You can travel to Latvia, it's not a dangerous country as long as you keep to yourself and don't show in any way, shape or form that you're gay.

Oh Jesus, I wrote so much without even realizing it

Hi @Tjemka88 welcome to the forum    

I didn't realise that Latvia was so homophobic. I always thought that the Baltic States were much more progressive, being part of the EU now. Still much work to be done on Human Rights there it seems.

(05-25-2020, 12:30 PM)Tjemka88 Wrote: No, fortunately, it's not as dangerous as Russia or Iran or something. Physical attacks are rare to none but there have been cases of parents disowning their kids because of them being gay. Throughout the whole country there is basically "don't ask, don't tell policy". PDA is a huge no-no.

And it's in your own best interest to keep silent. If you're openly gay, you might get verbally bullied in your school or job and there will definitely be a lot of people who'll turn their backs at you even if you were good friends previously. If your potential employer finds out about your sexuality, you might not get hired. Gay celebrities are getting an enormous amount of dirt on them in the internet comments.

It's difficult to tell what's the driving force for it is. Religion is surely one of the reasons, most Latvians are Christians and use the Bible to defend their reasons for disliking gays. Also, people see homosexuality as something that destroys the "traditional values" and strongly insist that only a man and a woman is a family. Latvians in their core simply are very stereotypical, old-fashioned and ignorant people, and anything that's out of the frames of their common lifestyle, is seen as weird, wrong, and bad.

We also do have Pride parades every now and then. They're very small and getting a lot of backlashes. One year there was shit thrown at the participants, actual feces. The government is also full of homophobes, same-sex marriage legalization has been turned down many times and it's unlikely to change.

You can travel to Latvia, it's not a dangerous country as long as you keep to yourself and don't show in any way, shape or form that you're gay.

Oh Jesus, I wrote so much without even realizing it

Thank you so much for taking the trouble. It was very interesting to read, although you confirmed some of what I suspected. I don't know what impression you may have of the UK or, say, France. In many ways we have made a lot of progress in social terms, but my partner will rarely hold hands with me in public when we are in his country and I am often similarly cautious about even very mild PDA here. Such conditioning runs very deep, possibly more so for oldies like me who lived when homosexual behaviour was still illegal. Even after that law changed in 1967 the police increased the number of traps they set and many gay men were convicted, fined and imprisoned for years afterwards. I was set up for entrapment sometime in 1973 (six years after the law was changed), but fortunately I had my wits about me and I didn't take the (rather attractive  ) bait.

We do have examples of homophobic responses in our government, but in the main I think most members of Parliament would say nothing rather than risk a backlash at election time. However, I do suspect that it would take very little for the tide to turn against us. The mainstream press and religious interests here have fuelled homophobia in the past and, I am sure, would be happy to continue the fight if the prevailing mood changed and they thought they could gather popular support. We continue to be the subject of jokes and if, for example, another deadly virus could be linked to our community I am sure we would see the mood turn very bad indeed. There is, of course much more to write about this, but this is probably not the thread for it!

Kind regards from England.