11-26-2011, 03:11 PM
first off welcome to gayspeak
ck out the coming_out section on this forum, a recent post with some stuff going on is this. Personally I think you need to start thinking of an exit plan before you get caught up in the growing circle of abuse. You know there is not a lot of information here so kinda not going to be accurate. but to start:
-usually the mother will be the most constructive. There is discussion if the dad needs to know in all situations. I am surprised your parents have not know you are gay already; especially if you have close family of you age the parent can compare you to. Husbands and wives can not keep a lot of secretes between each other.
-do you plan to leave for college? if so, your at school and your dad is at home, the two lives should not meet up. would your being out to your dad make him less supportive financially? Than dont do it.
in my previous straight relationship good and bad but i was the dad so some insight here. I might say some bad things about your dad.
-You know what they say about homophobes, recent theory, that they themselves are gay or at least not comfortable about their own sexuality. Where this is a good time to be gay in your dad's time frame it was negative. There were Sodomy Laws!
-I cant even think of how a parent would not promote their children to be the best they could be but situations could be driven by things; low education and economic opportunities, little exposure to the world as in reading, travel etc. You as the child can not over come these for him.
-A parent is not a god and you do not worship you dad. He may be overwhelmed with fear and ignorance the second he wakes up ever day and he reacts accordingly. Its not all abut you, he is bad to everyone. No reason you should play into his setup. Be the bigger man, Dont get cough up in this.
Time heals everything so in the right situation, a few yeas down the line, you dad will be able to better accept you being gay. This should not stop you from having fun, dating and relationships. You can start a family with a proper husband. deal with your dad and his family better than. If you dad is not that important in your life tell him and get it over with. Just living at home your not allowed to toss him to the curb.
ck out the coming_out section on this forum, a recent post with some stuff going on is this. Personally I think you need to start thinking of an exit plan before you get caught up in the growing circle of abuse. You know there is not a lot of information here so kinda not going to be accurate. but to start:
-usually the mother will be the most constructive. There is discussion if the dad needs to know in all situations. I am surprised your parents have not know you are gay already; especially if you have close family of you age the parent can compare you to. Husbands and wives can not keep a lot of secretes between each other.
-do you plan to leave for college? if so, your at school and your dad is at home, the two lives should not meet up. would your being out to your dad make him less supportive financially? Than dont do it.
in my previous straight relationship good and bad but i was the dad so some insight here. I might say some bad things about your dad.
-You know what they say about homophobes, recent theory, that they themselves are gay or at least not comfortable about their own sexuality. Where this is a good time to be gay in your dad's time frame it was negative. There were Sodomy Laws!
-I cant even think of how a parent would not promote their children to be the best they could be but situations could be driven by things; low education and economic opportunities, little exposure to the world as in reading, travel etc. You as the child can not over come these for him.
-A parent is not a god and you do not worship you dad. He may be overwhelmed with fear and ignorance the second he wakes up ever day and he reacts accordingly. Its not all abut you, he is bad to everyone. No reason you should play into his setup. Be the bigger man, Dont get cough up in this.
Time heals everything so in the right situation, a few yeas down the line, you dad will be able to better accept you being gay. This should not stop you from having fun, dating and relationships. You can start a family with a proper husband. deal with your dad and his family better than. If you dad is not that important in your life tell him and get it over with. Just living at home your not allowed to toss him to the curb.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
