How are you today?

[southbiochem]

I want to be positive again, and every time I think I’m on the right track it comes crashing down and I want to hurt myself again…….

I’m tired of this cycle, so very tired.

My greatest fear right now, if I can’t make it on GS, how am I to expect to make it in university. Can I?

It’s so frustrating!

But whatever, I’m to the point I no longer care what happens to me...

Uni will be different Jas, you'll have a goal, you'll be breathing a different air and you'll have more freedom, even to display your sexuality to those you might meet and get to trust. And your family doesn't even have to know mile:

That will take away a lot of what's troubling you right now, which is obviously exacerbated by the fact you're homebound, lonely, and with no visible goal at the moment.

Uni will be all of these things to you, so I can predict you will do more than fine, Jas.