How are you today?

[Amigo]

Amigo, how's it coming on all this being gay fixture? Are you deciding to make it a permanent trait of your life?

No... not yet... I can't be sure if I don't try the 'ultimate test'.

I can only confirm my suspicion (that I'm gay) if I try having sex with a dude. Try sucking his dick or have a guy suck mine.

But that's such an impossible thing to do, not because of the gender issue, but because I'm married... I'm not supposed to have sex with anyone else except my wife... and my hands.

Mentally, I've given blowjobs all over the website. (so to speak...) I even have a theory on how to suck good.

But I don't know if I can do that for REAL, you know what I mean?

I'm not exactly 'sex crazy' guy, but it's always there behind my head.

While I enjoy the non-sexual aspect of being gay, I can't fully enjoy it coz I always question, if this gay feeling is real or not.