How are you today?

[AlfredM]

I recently had a bad hair cut myself. Originally, I wanted to look like something like this:



but instead, I feel like I look like a pineapple due to my chubby cheeks, and maybe the barber left my top hair a bit too long, I don't know, lol. Then of course, my parents were furious with my experiment, saying it's non-Islamic or whatever, urgh. I can't stand this. Unemployment is messing with my head. And every time I went for an interview, I feel like I was being reminded that it doesn't matter how smart am I, social anxiety will always be my biggest obstacle. That was basically what I was told in my last 2 interviews, "poor social skills", "reserved". Not to mention, nothing I do feels satisfying or deserving anymore. No amount of foods, orgasm, weekend getaway, movies or series could make me content like before. I don't know how to have fun alone anymore, it seems like the only good time that I have is when I'm with my friends, and that's like once a month. Enough rant.

The only good thing is, April has come, probably my most favourite month of the year (I might be biased since it's my birth month,lol) with Spring (as if we experience that here), April Fool pranks, and all the promotions and free stuff given out (free movie tickets,wee~). I also intend to make some big changes, hopefully it's not just words, and get an actual help for my social anxiety despite my parents seem to think it's not that big of a deal (but my hair cut was,geez) and I could get rid of it with doing more religious activities (right).

Yeah, that's it for now. Hope you peeps are doing well, sorry for being distant from the forum for such a long time, I tend to shy away from people when my mind is messy.