Back...in the swing

[InbetweenDreams]

I understand your thinking 100%, avoiding medications like they are the plague as I am the same....BUT sometimes you get to the point (and hopefully like me) where you have a brilliant doctor and you put your faith in him.

There is always going to be side effects which include withdrawal and rebound, but when I look back, the side effects were so minor compared to where I would e if I sought no treatment.

Well in my case I wound up with a therapist. I might consider going back at some point. Right now I guess I need to rule out any other medical issues...

My problem here recently might be a developing caffeine sensitivity but also anxiety with occasional depression. Usually does start ramping up this time of year... I don't know that it is Seasonal Affect Disorder per say, I think it is just not having much to do with my free time when I am off and maybe ought to take a vitamin D supplement.

Anxiety... Well in 2014 I had a nasty panic attack, also the first one I ever had, thought I was dying, went to the ER.. Checked my heart and all that stuff, nothing wrong. So they slapped with a Generalized Anxiety Disorder (aka. we don't know why you're freaking out dude). Tried a few medications, either had no effect or caused me to vomit and puke... Lorazapam, which is a benzodiapene did work but they didn't want me to stay on it and I understand why. It was fast acting and did actually relax me with a very small dose. like 0.5 mg or something. Then they tried Zoloft, which turned me into, lets just say a Vulcan, if you watch star trek. It just killed my motivation and wasn't really happy or sad.

Not sure if there's something that can help mute the negative emotions and anxiety but still so I can actually feel that I enjoy things. Also would be nice to still have a sex life (although I guess might as well not worry about that as I will probably be single for some time)... Anyway, after I became pretty much dead against medication, started talking to a therapist and that seemed to help after some time. I stopped seeing her because of my job, yeah the old job I had basically prevented me from seeing a therapist. So That was pretty much it.

Anyway, now my underarms sweat a lot, doesn't matter if it is hot or cold in the room, sweat anyway. But... I don't sweat when I'm asleep, and the sweating usually stops after I get out of work... So I think either it is a caffeine issue or I am somehow more stressed than I think...and right now I wouldn't really classify my job being all that stressful right now, but maybe I am conditioned to it and don't realize it? I don't know. I also have a hard time trying to avoid coffee long enough to see whether that is the issue... You'd think being able to quit smoking for over 2 years, coffee wouldn't be a big deal lol

Anyway, that my quick short story... I didn't feel the need to go in about my depression or anything... I think I have made a thread about all that as well so no need to hijack your thread with all my baggage lol