How are you today?

[SrChulo]

I'm afraid we are dealing with a man who is strongly catholic at heart, has the guilt complex strongly ingrained, but also knows how to get someone to ride on the guilt trip.

It is a cultural difference, probably. He may be honest but in the end, he is not really, because he says one thing but means another... a bit like women sometimes.
I really don't know how you can keep this relationship going, Chulo, but maybe it's a good thing that you are going back to the States to finish your studies? A break will be good for you both to reassess what you mean to each other. I keep thinking, after your stories, that he is trying to manipulate you, but it's working less and less, isn't it?
Here, have a
PA

Yea he is a total manipulator. And yes: it's working less and less. Right now I'm leaving it up to him if he wants to be with a person who doesn't take shit like that.

I've recently spoken with his ex, just lightly, about this. He said he knew one day I'd be coming to him with all of this, but he didn't want to stop me in the beginning because it wasn't his place to do so. This came as no shock to me, as I knew that's how he felt. He had subtly warned me back then. There are differences, of course--their personalities clash much more. But maybe that leaves me with a worse situation. Not directly clashing can lead me into a rut where he's able to manipulate with fewer consequences. His ex is a person that can be a bit blinded by love, but I know he got fed up after a while. They were together 3 years. We both know that parts of borja are very difficult to endure, and neither of us knows if he is truly happy or if he will ever be able to love someone as much as he does himself.

At this point, i'm indifferent about the fact that I'll be leaving him. I miss him so much when I'm away, but I think I'll be okay when I actually move from here. He knows I'm leaving too, so he must have accepted it by now. He called me today asking if I forgive him. I said yes. I was thinking today that this could all be just another ploy to make me forget about it. Who knows if he is really remorseful.