10-06-2012, 02:30 AM
I just need some advice please.
My son is 24 and is living in Athens. He is a qualified engineer and soon after he graduated, he left for a "short" holiday to Europe with 3 other friends and the plan was for him to come back and work in his profession. He already had a job offer before he graduated.
The short holiday was funded by us as a congratulations gift that was supposed to be 4 weeks. During that 4 weeks he contacted us and said that he wanted to extend the holiday to 6 months and could we fund it and he would pay us back. We said yes because number one, we were stupid at the time and number two we were happy he was having a great time. We thought he is young and having a great time so why not.
3 Years later, he is still living overseas. We funded him for two years while he was overseas racking up a bill of thousands he had to pay us back - one day when the planets align I suppose. We totally got sick of it and told him no more money.
He found a job (the poor thing he is) and works serving tables and has to work long hours to make a basic wage. I help him out with money now and again but not much. He was living with mates and could survive on his wage. 6 months ago, he wanted his own place and privacy so he, against our wishes and advice, signed a lease for 12 months and has to pay 480 euros per month!
Now he spoke to me and said he was depressed because he didn't have any money and is finding it hard. I wanted to say I TOLD YOU SO but I never. I just said do you want me to help you with a saving plan and he said no.
What do I do............. do I give him money to get him though this or do I let him learn the hard way?
I want to let him learn the hard way so he can learn from this but I don't know if that is the right thing to do and am I being mean doing this? Just confused............
Yes he is a spoilt boy and needs a kick up the arse! I know that but he just seems to know how to get around me and if I don't give him money, he starts to get a bit cold towards me and reminds me how his other friends, have their European holiday covered by their parents........ so, naturally this makes me feel guilty
What do you think I should do?
My son is 24 and is living in Athens. He is a qualified engineer and soon after he graduated, he left for a "short" holiday to Europe with 3 other friends and the plan was for him to come back and work in his profession. He already had a job offer before he graduated.
The short holiday was funded by us as a congratulations gift that was supposed to be 4 weeks. During that 4 weeks he contacted us and said that he wanted to extend the holiday to 6 months and could we fund it and he would pay us back. We said yes because number one, we were stupid at the time and number two we were happy he was having a great time. We thought he is young and having a great time so why not.
3 Years later, he is still living overseas. We funded him for two years while he was overseas racking up a bill of thousands he had to pay us back - one day when the planets align I suppose. We totally got sick of it and told him no more money.
He found a job (the poor thing he is) and works serving tables and has to work long hours to make a basic wage. I help him out with money now and again but not much. He was living with mates and could survive on his wage. 6 months ago, he wanted his own place and privacy so he, against our wishes and advice, signed a lease for 12 months and has to pay 480 euros per month!
Now he spoke to me and said he was depressed because he didn't have any money and is finding it hard. I wanted to say I TOLD YOU SO but I never. I just said do you want me to help you with a saving plan and he said no.
What do I do............. do I give him money to get him though this or do I let him learn the hard way?
I want to let him learn the hard way so he can learn from this but I don't know if that is the right thing to do and am I being mean doing this? Just confused............
Yes he is a spoilt boy and needs a kick up the arse! I know that but he just seems to know how to get around me and if I don't give him money, he starts to get a bit cold towards me and reminds me how his other friends, have their European holiday covered by their parents........ so, naturally this makes me feel guilty
What do you think I should do?
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