09-13-2012, 02:46 AM
I believe there is such a thing as true homosexuality, true heterosexuality and everything in between.
Yes, sexuality can be fluid, but one can also be set in their ways too and know what they are attracted to. No matter how much one may want to rebel against it, eventually, one must face up to their sexuality.
Example: When I was in high school, I was still trying to deny to myself that I was gay (I was brought up by a religious nut-job of a father who drilled homophobic rhetoric into me at a very early age) and that I could "make" it with a woman if I choose to do so. After all, closeted gay men in the 50's and 60's like Anthony Perkins, Rock Hudson and Robert Reed were all married to women and they seemed happy. How naive I was.
I picked out a girl and began to date her. Throughout the entire facade of a courtship, I knew I was just going through the motions and parroting what other straight couples were doing at the time. No matter how much I tried to deny it to myself, the feelings of "this isn't you and you damn well know it!" would surface.
It got to the point where she wanted to have sex one evening. I felt NOTHING, no desire, not the faintest twinge at the prospect of making love to her. But, you know the drill by now, I was lying to myself through my teeth.
I tried to perform, could not get an erection...I just felt detached from everything around me...it was a horrible feeling. I felt like a bad clone of a human being, or one of Jack Finney's pod people, trying to fit in but it was painfully obvious I wasn't cutting the mustard. I liked this girl yes, but I did not love her in a sexual manner, and I could have cared less about her nude body. There's more to tell, but you get the gist of where this is going I hope, and quite frankly, I'd rather not delve too much deeper into this memory....it was a bad evening I'd rather soon forget lets just say.
It was that night after the whole debacle had ended I was finally able to accept myself as I am. I am a 100% gay man. I am not sexually attracted to women, I can appreciate the beauty of a woman on an aesthetic level, but I have no desire to be with a woman sexualy.
Or, in short, everyone is different. We have gays and lesbians, we have straights and we have bisexuals. Everyone falls into one catagory or another
mile:
Yes, sexuality can be fluid, but one can also be set in their ways too and know what they are attracted to. No matter how much one may want to rebel against it, eventually, one must face up to their sexuality.
Example: When I was in high school, I was still trying to deny to myself that I was gay (I was brought up by a religious nut-job of a father who drilled homophobic rhetoric into me at a very early age) and that I could "make" it with a woman if I choose to do so. After all, closeted gay men in the 50's and 60's like Anthony Perkins, Rock Hudson and Robert Reed were all married to women and they seemed happy. How naive I was.
I picked out a girl and began to date her. Throughout the entire facade of a courtship, I knew I was just going through the motions and parroting what other straight couples were doing at the time. No matter how much I tried to deny it to myself, the feelings of "this isn't you and you damn well know it!" would surface.
It got to the point where she wanted to have sex one evening. I felt NOTHING, no desire, not the faintest twinge at the prospect of making love to her. But, you know the drill by now, I was lying to myself through my teeth.
I tried to perform, could not get an erection...I just felt detached from everything around me...it was a horrible feeling. I felt like a bad clone of a human being, or one of Jack Finney's pod people, trying to fit in but it was painfully obvious I wasn't cutting the mustard. I liked this girl yes, but I did not love her in a sexual manner, and I could have cared less about her nude body. There's more to tell, but you get the gist of where this is going I hope, and quite frankly, I'd rather not delve too much deeper into this memory....it was a bad evening I'd rather soon forget lets just say.
It was that night after the whole debacle had ended I was finally able to accept myself as I am. I am a 100% gay man. I am not sexually attracted to women, I can appreciate the beauty of a woman on an aesthetic level, but I have no desire to be with a woman sexualy.
Or, in short, everyone is different. We have gays and lesbians, we have straights and we have bisexuals. Everyone falls into one catagory or another
mile:
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
