I'm not worth this much energy

[lizzielee]

One of my former coworkers who is openly gay was partly responsible for my inspiration to come out, so I thanked him for it. Shortly after that, he added me on facebook. About three days later he started texting me and telling me how he used to check me out when we worked the sane shift. I had a suspicion that he had sine sort of crush on me, and finally I just asked him and he said yes, followed by a solicitous monologue. I should probably mention that he lives with his boyfriend, who was in the apartment with him during this conversation. I managed to politely point out that while I just recently ended a relationship, his vein of conversation was not appropriate when he is in a relationship.

He also detailed some of the problems in his relationship, which indicated fundamental trust issues.

As soon as I realized my former coworker (I'll call him DC) was flirting with me, I let my ex (I'll call him Teddy) know what was going on (i did this because I didn't want to surprise him later and leave him wondering why I waited). I also pointed out to DC that I had hurt Teddy deeply, and knowing this would hurt him more, not to mention assisting DC in cheating, prevented me from taking him up on his offer.


So after that blew over, and I realized how bad some relationships can be, I realized I missed Teddy. But now I'm not sure what to do about it, and I'm not keen on the idea of hurting him again.

You had the wise sense not to take up the offer from DC who sounds like whoever he is in a relationship with, this behaviour will repeat itself. As for Teddy, there must of been the reasons why you two are not together. It's easy to forget these reasons when you have split and you sometimes just remember the good times and not the bad....... A break between couples will either seal the break or you will start to miss him which sounds like you perhaps are. Maybe a meet up where you can just talk and express your feelings. You can relay to Teddy you are frightened you will hurt him again and then take it from there.........
Good luck with it all.......
Take care...........don't rush anything....
mile: