Advice needed

[lizzielee]

No more money until he is home where you can control what money to where. Even if it works to get him home...no money to HIM. If he came home to begin building for himself I'd consider matching him in a graduated fashion so that the more he earns the more you promise up to your capacity limit. Like for the first year, a deposit and first month's rent might be reasonable, but no more assistance other than maybe some food until he's stayed put and stable for six months. Something to this effect...IN WRITING...face-to-face agreed upon in the family as a matter of family. AND NO OTHER deals or gifts or giving in! (just my advice)

Otherwise, NO MORE MONEY PERIOD.

I trust my gut and I smell substance abuse. I'd demand regular drug screenings or NO MONEY PERIOD. NO matter how outlandish he may scream the suspicion is. (just my advice)

Don't you just want to love your child and not care how anyone else judges the circumstance? I am sorry for your worry, but you are a good parent despite any mistakes. We all get to keep growing and learning as long as we are actually living! Show him...don't tell him.

Thank you. I feel that I totally spoilt him and made him into this person he is today..... I gave him everything as a child and realised I should of drawn the line at some stage. Thank you for your kind words. Yes no more money, I will have to do that........ I went over for 6 weeks in April/May to visit him as I had suspicions of "where was the money going" but I could not see any evidence of drugs. Just a pile of new clothes and lots of new ipads and tablets and those types of things........