02-01-2016, 03:55 AM
Thanks [MENTION=22727]Cridders88[/MENTION] and [MENTION=23097]Insertnamehere[/MENTION]
It reminds me on how I overcame my self esteem on my injured leg too.
I was previously so embarrassed to run in public due to the appearance of my left leg. That was around 2009. By 2010, I said screw it. So I began to run in public by wearing baggy sweatpants in black color. I thought that wearing black makes the 'appearance' of my left leg less obvious.
It works. Although few people thought I was a Paralympic athlete lol. Once I was approached by a Paralympic kayak athlete. He invited me to join our country's team.
In early May 2013, I had an opportunity to speak to a security guard who works for a shopping center that is located right across of my office. He was in his late 30. I think.
“Are you an athlete?” He asked. ‘I always see you run in the morning.”
“Pardon, an athlete?” I didn’t expect that.
“Yes, a Paralympic athlete.”
“Paralympic athlete …”I sighed. I understood why he thought I was a Paralympic athlete.
“Yes, have you ever heard of Paralympics? It’s a sport tournament for disabled people like you.”
I didn’t utter a word. I just nodded my head.
“I’ve been working as a security guard for a year now.” He then said. “I did a lot of bad things in the past. I was a drug addict too.”
Hmm. I was puzzled. Why is he suddenly sharing his personal life with me? But I didn’t say a thing. I continued to listen to his story.
He told me that people who know his past look down upon him.
“What has happened has already happened.” I smiled at him. “You’ve realized that you have made mistakes and now you’re trying to make things right for you.”
He nodded his head. He avoided eye contact with me as much as possible.
“Most people can never be happy for other people. So don’t think about them. Think about your future and you. Just keep on moving and improving.” I added.
“I see you do morning run every single day. Even though you are disabled, you still outdo the able-bodied. You have determination and strength. Never in my life had I found someone who truly inspires me as much as you do …” He smiled sheepishly.
I was honestly startled that I wasn’t able to say a word to him afterward. Thankfully I still managed to give him a smile and a pat on his right shoulder.
The security guard reminds me of two young patients that I met in a hospital in 2012. Last December 2012, I was admitted into a hospital for a surgery. The surgery was supposed to be my fourth surgery but it was eventually cancelled by my surgeon. Nevertheless I did spend one night in the hospital and had the chance to get to know these two courageous ‘special’ teenagers and one of their mothers. They don’t like to be called disabled.
Anyway the teenagers, the mother and I spent the whole night talking with each other. They wanted to know about everything – my weight loss story, my leg injury and more. These teenagers consider me as their big brother, a role model and a hero.
I meant so much to both of them that one of them gave his burger that he was planning to eat to me. I gently declined as I don’t eat junk food but he insisted. “Please, Jay. Just this once. Please. You can get back in shape after you leave the hospital.”
So I took a bite with a heavy heart.
“How does it taste? Since you haven’t eaten junk food for years.” He asked.
“It tastes … weird.” I chuckled.
They all laughed.
There was another touching moment that I can’t forget. The same kid asked for my permission to hold my arm for a few seconds. I asked him why. He said he wants a bit of my positive spirit.
Anyways back to my leg. Sorry I can be talkative and I like to write 'essay'.
In 2014, I had the urge to wear shorts in public. Particularly while training in my gym.
I was thinking why on earth do I want to cover my legs 24/7? There's no point to be embarrassed by the left leg cause in the end I'm stuck with it and it belongs to me. Besides I have bubble butt. Thanks to squat etc. So I want to show off those cheeks by wearing gray shorts.
So I purchased few shorts and began to wear them in public and gym. It was awkward for the first few weeks. I noticed few of my gym friends felt the same way too. But I was like, eh.
It reminds me on how I overcame my self esteem on my injured leg too.
I was previously so embarrassed to run in public due to the appearance of my left leg. That was around 2009. By 2010, I said screw it. So I began to run in public by wearing baggy sweatpants in black color. I thought that wearing black makes the 'appearance' of my left leg less obvious.
It works. Although few people thought I was a Paralympic athlete lol. Once I was approached by a Paralympic kayak athlete. He invited me to join our country's team.
In early May 2013, I had an opportunity to speak to a security guard who works for a shopping center that is located right across of my office. He was in his late 30. I think.
“Are you an athlete?” He asked. ‘I always see you run in the morning.”
“Pardon, an athlete?” I didn’t expect that.
“Yes, a Paralympic athlete.”
“Paralympic athlete …”I sighed. I understood why he thought I was a Paralympic athlete.
“Yes, have you ever heard of Paralympics? It’s a sport tournament for disabled people like you.”
I didn’t utter a word. I just nodded my head.
“I’ve been working as a security guard for a year now.” He then said. “I did a lot of bad things in the past. I was a drug addict too.”
Hmm. I was puzzled. Why is he suddenly sharing his personal life with me? But I didn’t say a thing. I continued to listen to his story.
He told me that people who know his past look down upon him.
“What has happened has already happened.” I smiled at him. “You’ve realized that you have made mistakes and now you’re trying to make things right for you.”
He nodded his head. He avoided eye contact with me as much as possible.
“Most people can never be happy for other people. So don’t think about them. Think about your future and you. Just keep on moving and improving.” I added.
“I see you do morning run every single day. Even though you are disabled, you still outdo the able-bodied. You have determination and strength. Never in my life had I found someone who truly inspires me as much as you do …” He smiled sheepishly.
I was honestly startled that I wasn’t able to say a word to him afterward. Thankfully I still managed to give him a smile and a pat on his right shoulder.
The security guard reminds me of two young patients that I met in a hospital in 2012. Last December 2012, I was admitted into a hospital for a surgery. The surgery was supposed to be my fourth surgery but it was eventually cancelled by my surgeon. Nevertheless I did spend one night in the hospital and had the chance to get to know these two courageous ‘special’ teenagers and one of their mothers. They don’t like to be called disabled.
Anyway the teenagers, the mother and I spent the whole night talking with each other. They wanted to know about everything – my weight loss story, my leg injury and more. These teenagers consider me as their big brother, a role model and a hero.
I meant so much to both of them that one of them gave his burger that he was planning to eat to me. I gently declined as I don’t eat junk food but he insisted. “Please, Jay. Just this once. Please. You can get back in shape after you leave the hospital.”
So I took a bite with a heavy heart.
“How does it taste? Since you haven’t eaten junk food for years.” He asked.
“It tastes … weird.” I chuckled.
They all laughed.
There was another touching moment that I can’t forget. The same kid asked for my permission to hold my arm for a few seconds. I asked him why. He said he wants a bit of my positive spirit.
Anyways back to my leg. Sorry I can be talkative and I like to write 'essay'.
In 2014, I had the urge to wear shorts in public. Particularly while training in my gym.
I was thinking why on earth do I want to cover my legs 24/7? There's no point to be embarrassed by the left leg cause in the end I'm stuck with it and it belongs to me. Besides I have bubble butt. Thanks to squat etc. So I want to show off those cheeks by wearing gray shorts.
So I purchased few shorts and began to wear them in public and gym. It was awkward for the first few weeks. I noticed few of my gym friends felt the same way too. But I was like, eh.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
