I Dont Know When

[CrossNecklace]

This morning he gave me a haircut and we didnt mention bout anything last night. Until he finished. He asked me if I told my mom yet, and i said no i havent. he asked if i wanted him to tell her. I said yes. then he asked if i wanted him to go with me to the meeting. i said no and that it's ok. I saw his eyes were teary. I felt so bad. i started to tear up too in the shower but i told myself to be strong. was this a good idea? should i have told him? but i knew that this day had to come one day. it just happened to be this day. on my way to school, i thought about my mom and how she might feel when she finds out from my dad, i started to tear up again and that i felt regret about coming out...but i knew i had to do it. when i came home from school, and after i ate, my dad talked to me again. He said that he told my mom. and that she was crying because she felt the same way as he did, that they were both scared for me and that there are people out there who don't know anything. He told me that he had bad experiences with gay people. He told me how they're pervert and that in the Philippines some gays would teach little kids how to be gay. i was thinking in my head that that's not possible, its not possible to turn a person gay. they are born that way. but i'm not really sure anymore. anyways he kept mentioning how maybe i'm getting the wrong idea since i was teased as a child. He told me that he and my mom loves me no matter what and how he was my dad and that he has to accept me for who i am. he also said i could always go to him and my mom for anything. i haven't told my bro but i will soon. by the way my mom just called. i havent talked to her cuz she's at work. but she said how i was doing. i said i was ok and i asked her how she was doing. she said just ok. she also asked me if i've told my friends. i said no. and that i dont need to tell them. but i know in my heart that i do.

guys i dont know what to do. it feels so awkward with my dad...and now with my mom. i think we're gonna have the talk again...but with both of them... tomorrow. i have to tell my younger bro before they talk to me so that he becomes aware of this. i know my bro would not care whther im gay or not. but that's kinda what i thought bout mom and dad.

guys tomorrow is the meeting. i hope i find good friends. i hope i find what im looking for.