Gemini
07-31-2016, 02:08 PM
Like drobs said above this is a tricky situation and there could be many different things going on here:
Situation A - Your friend is potentially gay or at least bi-curious, and having a hard time coming to terms with it / expressing it. This is your best case scenario because it means he possibly reciprocates your feelings towards him. However it is unreasonable for him to tell you to not date or have sex with anyone else under a pretext of trying to set you up. You can't force him to come out if he is gay or bisexual or whatever. But on the reverse side he can't expect you to wait what? Weeks? Months? Years? Date other guys, flirt, have sex, live your life and hopefully when he is ready he will tell you, but try not to depend on that outcome, as I said this is but one possible explanation for whats going on.
Situation B - He is irreversibly straight, but is dedicated to being your friend. As you said before, you suddenly stopped being his friend because you were jealous of his girlfriend. It sounds like you were both pretty torn up about it, and he really wanted to be friends again. You said he knew how you had a crush on him? And when he started dating a girl you broke contact with him, perhaps (and this is pure speculation) he thinks you will only remain his friend if you think there is a chance of sex or a relationship with him. If this is possibly the case then you need to set the boundaries of your friendship with him, assure him you are his friend first and foremost, and that he doesn't need to tease you or lead you on to remain friends with you.
Situation C - This situation is only a possibility (I can only guess while you know whats going on far better than I ever could) but it is possible that your friend is using you a little. You say you drove 2 and a half hours to the airport for him, and that you console him over his relationships. Yet what does he actually do for you? He knew you had a crush on him but didn't say anything until he had to, he tells you to remain single so that your attention doesn't focus on anyone else, he makes pretty obvious advances but makes sure you know he's straight and nothing is ever going to happen. I hope I'm completely wrong but if I am right then you need to distance yourself from the friendship a little, focus more on yourself and hope that once the 'favors' go away there's still a frienship to go back to.
Anyway these are my three possibilites for what MIGHT be going on, truth is it might be a mixture of all three or it might be something else entirely, only you can decide for yourself.
I wish you the best for your situation and that you and your friend work things out.
Situation A - Your friend is potentially gay or at least bi-curious, and having a hard time coming to terms with it / expressing it. This is your best case scenario because it means he possibly reciprocates your feelings towards him. However it is unreasonable for him to tell you to not date or have sex with anyone else under a pretext of trying to set you up. You can't force him to come out if he is gay or bisexual or whatever. But on the reverse side he can't expect you to wait what? Weeks? Months? Years? Date other guys, flirt, have sex, live your life and hopefully when he is ready he will tell you, but try not to depend on that outcome, as I said this is but one possible explanation for whats going on.
Situation B - He is irreversibly straight, but is dedicated to being your friend. As you said before, you suddenly stopped being his friend because you were jealous of his girlfriend. It sounds like you were both pretty torn up about it, and he really wanted to be friends again. You said he knew how you had a crush on him? And when he started dating a girl you broke contact with him, perhaps (and this is pure speculation) he thinks you will only remain his friend if you think there is a chance of sex or a relationship with him. If this is possibly the case then you need to set the boundaries of your friendship with him, assure him you are his friend first and foremost, and that he doesn't need to tease you or lead you on to remain friends with you.
Situation C - This situation is only a possibility (I can only guess while you know whats going on far better than I ever could) but it is possible that your friend is using you a little. You say you drove 2 and a half hours to the airport for him, and that you console him over his relationships. Yet what does he actually do for you? He knew you had a crush on him but didn't say anything until he had to, he tells you to remain single so that your attention doesn't focus on anyone else, he makes pretty obvious advances but makes sure you know he's straight and nothing is ever going to happen. I hope I'm completely wrong but if I am right then you need to distance yourself from the friendship a little, focus more on yourself and hope that once the 'favors' go away there's still a frienship to go back to.
Anyway these are my three possibilites for what MIGHT be going on, truth is it might be a mixture of all three or it might be something else entirely, only you can decide for yourself.
I wish you the best for your situation and that you and your friend work things out.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
