Aquarius
My experience of religion, or rather the Roman branch came from an early involvement with the music of the church as a pipe organ student at a Roman Catholic cathedral. Although deeply moved by the musical liturgy I was never a genuine believer from an early age seeing the Christian God as a twisted sad-masochist. My opinion hasn’t changed apart from viewing theology, and especially biblical apologetics from an agnostic point of view. Stumbling across the Bishop (still a Cardinal!) receiving blow jobs from alter boys in the vestry didn’t much disturb me.
However, the last straw happened at age 16, two weeks after easter. Each year a group of priests etc from the cathedral and from the High Anglican church on the other side of the road holidayed at the oceanside where they owned vacation houses. On the first night I coped with the sex, booze and drug consumption taking place around me. On the Sunday morning I didn’t cope with being offered the ‘privilege’ of being a naked offering on a domestic alter during a black mass. Grabbing my few possessions I snuck down to the highway and hitched back to the city. The experience traumatised me so thoroughly a never returned to organ studies.
Luckily they didn’t manage to destroy my love of the musical liturgy. To this day experiencing, for instance, Bach’s organ works and masses as the highest expression of human beauty - that is if I manage to suppress my awareness of the intended meaning of the texts.
As an agnostic I can imagine there is a creator/creators of some kind responsible for the universe we find ouselves in. I have no idea what he/she/it/they might be.
One thing has remained with me all these decades later, an intense loathing for organised religion of every form . The overweaning arrogance of any group who imagine they speak for and on behalf of their particular God still astonishes.
"And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie” 2nd Thessalonians 2:11.
However, the last straw happened at age 16, two weeks after easter. Each year a group of priests etc from the cathedral and from the High Anglican church on the other side of the road holidayed at the oceanside where they owned vacation houses. On the first night I coped with the sex, booze and drug consumption taking place around me. On the Sunday morning I didn’t cope with being offered the ‘privilege’ of being a naked offering on a domestic alter during a black mass. Grabbing my few possessions I snuck down to the highway and hitched back to the city. The experience traumatised me so thoroughly a never returned to organ studies.
Luckily they didn’t manage to destroy my love of the musical liturgy. To this day experiencing, for instance, Bach’s organ works and masses as the highest expression of human beauty - that is if I manage to suppress my awareness of the intended meaning of the texts.
As an agnostic I can imagine there is a creator/creators of some kind responsible for the universe we find ouselves in. I have no idea what he/she/it/they might be.
One thing has remained with me all these decades later, an intense loathing for organised religion of every form . The overweaning arrogance of any group who imagine they speak for and on behalf of their particular God still astonishes.
"And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie” 2nd Thessalonians 2:11.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
